Alabama Divorce & Family Law Attorney Blog : Birmingham Divorce Lawyer & Attorney : Eversole Law Firm : Serving Birmingham, Montgomery, Mobile Alabama

A great resource for parents going through a divorce, Breakthrough Parenting offers some interesting insights into better parenting.  They offer help for divorcing parents and offer classes in becoming a certified parenting coach.  In today's world, we cannot do everything alone.  This website gives parents some much needed advice. Dealing with your children who often do not understand the situation is very hard.  While we cannot eliminate these kind of stresses, my firm tries to limit them.  We are here to help you through this very difficult time.  I want my office to be more than just a law firm.  When you retain my firm we are here through thick and thin, to the very end, and we are on call 24/7.

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Sometimes divorce is a necessary means to achieving a happier life.  While we provide services that enable you to start a new life, we also try to acclimate you and your children to these changes. My practice attempts to minimize the impact a divorce has on you, and your children. You can find valuable resources about dealing with your children at childrenanddivorce.com that may aid your child during a divorce.

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Parents often have a difficult time dealing with the time constraints divorce places on their lives.  Juggling schedules during a marriage is hard, and when children are involved, it gets harder after divorce.  Divorce is an emotional and draining experience, especially during the holidays or during vacation time.  Here is a list prepared by divorcenet.com on ten tips to a relaxing vacation or holiday. 

I believe tip number ten from the above list is one that applies to more than just holiday and divorce scheduling, and is perhaps the best means to having a better life after divorce. Let the children love you ex-spouse, move on with your life, and try not to harbor ill feelings.  I realize that is easier said than done and that sometimes it can take years to get over the negative emotions involved with your ex.  But without fail, the ones who have moved on and no longer feel anger towards their ex-spouse are resoundingly the happiest. 

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It seems that every year more and more parents ask me for advice regarding how to address the issue of divorce with their children.  Several factors must be considered, including the child's age, functional ability, personal strengths and weaknesses.  The first year after divorce is the most difficult because a great deal of what was once considered, "normal life" is changing for your children.  It is stressful on parents, but the negative effects on children can be buffered with smart parenting.  Get with your spouse and set some basic ground rules.   Rule number one,  Never argue with, or degrade your ex in front of the kids.  The best protection that you can provide for your child during your divorce is your own personal love and attention, combined with smart parenting tactics that have your child's social/emotional health at the forefront.  Two great articles addressing divorce with children www.nasponline.org/resources/parenting/divorce_ho.aspx , and divorce in blended families http://apahelpcenter.org/articles/article.php?id=41 , are recommended readings. 

Books for kids: 

"Was It the Chocolate Pudding?" A Story for Little Kids About Divorce by Sandra Levins (ages 2-6)

"I Don't Want to Talk About It":  A Story About Divorce for Young Children by Jeanie Franz Ransom

Ginny Morris and Mom's House, Dad's House by Mary Collins Gallagher

My Parents are Divorced Too:  A Book for Kids by Kids, Second Edition Melanie, Annie & Steven Ford as told to Jan Blackstone Ford

"What Can I Do?"  A Book for Children of Divorce by Danielle Lowry

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