Alabama Divorce & Family Law Attorney Blog : Birmingham Divorce Lawyer & Attorney : Eversole Law Firm : Serving Birmingham, Montgomery, Mobile Alabama

In the recent maelstrom of mistress allegations, Tiger Woods may be headed to divorce court if the gossip pages are correct. As a Birmingham divorce and family law attorney, I have first-hand experience with divorce and separation cases involving infidelity in a marriage. While Mr. Woods’ situation is perhaps more extreme than most, the result -- a wife deciding to consult a divorce lawyer -- is nothing new in my profession.

Revelations of a single or as in this case multiple affairs can quickly push a marriage toward divorce or, at best, legal separation. Sports figures, entertainers and other personalities can sometimes be more prone to marital troubles than the rest of us, it’s a big let down to those who revere these high-profile names.

In this case, according to various news reports, Elin Nordegren is planning to divorce the fallen golf icon. That piece of information came from a source, who recently spoke to People magazine, adding that Nordegren has “made up her mind." More damning is the reports from the New York Daily News, which reported that the 29-year-old Nordegren and husband Tiger would be “going their separate ways for the holidays.”

The article says that the former model will be heading to Sweden with the couple’s two children, while Woods will be staying home. According to reports, the golfer is looking for a “safe harbor” and waiting for the storm to settle. He reportedly will be spending the holidays with two or three of his male friends.

Reports also state that a friend of Woods claims the golf great had likely cheated on Nordegren with more than the dozen or so women who have already emerged since Thanksgiving. The latest news reports allege that Woods wired thousands of dollars every month to several women, with one receiving up to $20,000 a month, according to MSNBC.

Tiger Woods' wife Elin Nordegren ready for divorce: report, NYDailyNews.com, December 16, 2009

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Marriage is a sacred institution which sometimes becomes a trial for those ill-suited to the needs of another, or the sacrifices which a marital partnership requires. As a Birmingham divorce lawyer and family law attorney, I have helped many couples through their individual rough patches. Unfortunately, even the best of counseling cannot hold together a relationship that has fallen apart. That is when legal separation or actual divorce become the only alternative, sad to say.

To begin, in Alabama a valid marriage is marked by a number of conditions. Each of these, and as a group, helps to define what is or is not a legal marriage in the state of Alabama. They include the following:

• Nobody under 14 years of age has the capacity to contract marriage
• For all persons under the age of 18, the consent of a parent or guardian is absolutely required
• Both parties to the marriage must be of sound mind
• Each must be able to contract marriage, and
• The parties cannot be related, at least within a prohibited degree as defined by the state

The Alabama Marriage Protection Act, which was made into law in 1998, specifies that marriage is an inherently unique relationship between a man and a women. A marriage contracted between individuals of the same sex is invalid in Alabama. ALA. CODE 30-1-19(b) (1975). Furthermore, the act also holds that the State of Alabama shall not recognize the marriage of parties of the same sex from other states.

Finally, a marriage cannot exist without the mutual consent of both parties. Since consent is lacking if a previous marriage existed, or when consent is procured by duress, a marriage is not valid when obtained under either circumstance. This is when my work as a divorce lawyer must inevietably come into play. Divorce legally separates and divides a family's assets, and in some cases it actually divides the family. But this is a discussion for another time.

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These days it’s not hard to find families in distress. Divorce and separation loom large as people face a variety of stress factors that make for a daunting day-to-day existence for many married couples. Along with all the other challenges of married life, the current world economic situation has created more difficulties. From Birmingham and Huntsville to Montgomery and Mobile, we can all see it. As an Alabama divorce lawyer and family law attorney, I hear on a daily basis the hardships taken on by many married couples around our state.

Anybody who has ever been married knows that trouble with the family finances can easily trigger marital discord. In fact, financial stress is one of the most common factors leading to divorce. The past couple years have been extremely difficult, even for the most well-adjusted couples. Everyone is feeling the pressure and uncertainty of the global economy.

Some things cannot be controlled, but one point to keep in mind is that when family problems lead to divorce, it can be very tough on a person's finances. Of course, divorce itself can add to your costs, such as legal fees, a possible second residence and sometimes shared custody or support orders.

This is a lot to consider, especially if you are already in debt. Any additional financial obligations can quickly become overwhelming. With constant calls from creditors, some people begin to feel trapped to the point of filing for bankruptcy. But bankruptcy can also greatly impact certain aspects of your divorce.

For instance, which proceeding you file first can change what you own and owe under the law. Following a divorce, the language used in the divorce decree can even determine whether spouses' debts to one another are wiped out by the bankruptcy. If you're considering a bankruptcy during or after divorce, or if your former spouse is considering it, you must speak with a qualified family law attorney. I cannot stress this enough.

In a nutshell, most people have two options open to them. In a Chapter 7, or liquidation, bankruptcy, a person sells all of his or her assets they can in order to pay off your creditors. Any remaining bills are then forgiven. In a Chapter 13, or restructuring, bankruptcy, a person chooses to keep their assets while making a plan to gradually repay their creditors over a three- to five-year period.

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Even as a Birmingham divorce and family law attorney, I personally hate to see people get divorced. For the children of parents going through a divorce, for the other family members and even for the couple’s friends and neighbors, it’s a very difficult and stressful time. But there are instances when I have no qualms about recommending divorce and that is where domestic violence is involved. I cannot tolerate spousal abuse, and I’m certain every thinking person out there cannot either.

Did you know that each year, nearly four million women are physically assaulted by their partner in the United States? That’s an awful statistic, and worthy of some serious thought. While most divorces have more to do with some form of incompatibility, a fair number are in response to violence. Of course, domestic violence doesn’t always have to be physical in nature. I’ve represented more than a few clients whose spouses used a psychological approach to antagonize and abuse their wife, or husband.

Every week we hear news stories of physical violence that can arise during a marriage, but even afterward the abuser can reach out to the victim again and again. Recently, I ran across a positive story of a domestic abuse survivor who says that in sharing her story, she hopes to keep others from having the same fate as many tragic victims of domestic violence. This woman was physically attacked by her abuser, who literally was trying to kill her.

The television report provided important warnings on how other victims can hopefully avoid a similar situation. For instance, they advise that one should never meet with their abuser in private. Seemingly innocent excuses can be a smokescreen meant to fool the victim into meeting, such as asking a former spouse to stop by to feed a family pet. It can be a dangerous lure.

Bottom line: When it comes to domestic abuse, avoid all contact with the other party -- take advantage of caller ID and simply don’t answer the phone when he calls. And if you’re not certain how to start, by all means contact an experienced family law attorney to find out your rights and how to legally protect yourself and your children.

Surviving Domestic Violence, NBCAugusta.com, June 22, 2009

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