Alabama Divorce & Family Law Attorney Blog : Birmingham Divorce Lawyer & Attorney : Eversole Law Firm : Serving Birmingham, Montgomery, Mobile Alabama

Taking your problems to a court of law may seem like a necessary solution, but it is rarely a simple process without the right kind of help. As a Birmingham divorce lawyer and family law attorney, I’ve assisted many Alabama residents in areas such as child custody, child support and spousal support, or maintenance.

If you live in Montgomery County, Talladega County, Cullman County or any of the dozens of towns and cities throughout the state, you face the same court system that thousands of local people face every year when pursuing justice for themselves and their families. When it comes to divorce and other related marital cases found in family court, the path to a favorable resolution can be fraught with pitfalls and time-consuming hurdles.

Lawsuits in Alabama can take months or even years to make it to court. But if you're pursuing a divorce you can’t wait to have that settlement over and done with. Most everyone I’ve counseled regarding divorce or legal separation has wanted a quick decision from the judge. That decision must include who gets custody of the children, the family vehicle, money held in multiple bank accounts, the couple’s home, a whole range of items.

As a spouse with little or no means, a decision by the court also must address monies for child support and other payments. In short, you cannot wait months or years for your case to inch its way through the state’s court system.

The good news here is that you do not have to wait. When couples become separated, important issues are often resolved via a short hearing before a judge, instead of requiring a full-blown trial. These hearings are usually held in a special court, referred to as family court in most states.

Regardless of the brevity that these sessions typically offer, because they are so quick you must be prepared and know exactly what you want to ask. You may have only a few minutes to state your side.

One helpful tool is the Temporary Order. This can be used by a spouse with little income of her own to help start some kind of support payment in order to feed and shelter the couple’s children. For example, a wife who has been abandoned can go to court to request a temporary order from a judge, even though a formal divorce action has not yet been filed. Her request will be put on a fast track, and a hearing will be scheduled within days or weeks.

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Because Alabama recognizes legal separation, most people looking at divorce in cites like Tuscaloosa, Bessemer, Huntsville and Mobile do not always have to file for divorce, at least not immediately. As a Birmingham divorce lawyer, I know that a certain percentage of people considering a divorce action will also have thought about separation as an alternative. Legal separation, which can also be referred to as "judicial separation," "separate maintenance" or "divorce a mensa et thoro" (which translates roughly into "divorce from bed-and-board"), is one way that marital partners can legally formalize what is a de facto separation while at the same time staying legally married.

Folks all around Alabama choose legal separation for a wide variety of reasons. However, the most frequent explanation is because the one or both spouses believe that the marriage may still have a chance of being saved. Occasionally, legal separation may be chosen because of one or both of the parties have a moral or religious objection to divorce.

For the state of Alabama to recognize a legal separation, both parties must enter a decree of legal separation assuming all of the following requirements are satisfied:

1. The court determines that the jurisdictional requirements for the dissolution of a marriage have been met

2. The court determines the marriage is irretrievably broken or there exists a complete incompatibility of temperament or one or both of the parties desires to live separate and apart

3. To the extent that it has jurisdiction to do so, the court has considered, approved, or provided for child custody, and has entered an order for child support in compliance with Rule 32 of the Alabama Rules of Judicial Administration

As the above suggests, while legal separation does not necessarily lead to a divorce, it can leave the door open to reconciliation, in which case the parties typically do not need to do anything more since they are still married in the eyes of the law. If, however, the couple does not manage to find common ground, they may then wish to go through with a divorce, which must be filed for explicitly.

A qualified family law and divorce lawyer can help individuals navigate through the complexities of legal separation as well as full-blown divorce actions, which can be of great help during what is usually a difficult and emotional time for most people.
 

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As a Birmingham divorce lawyer, I know that sooner or later some people will need the services of an experienced divorce attorney. One of the reasons folks turn to a legal professional is because of the complex and sometimes labyrinthine structure of our legal system here in Alabama. Regardless of whether a person is getting a divorce in Gadsden or Tuscaloosa, or becoming legally separated in Mobile or Huntsville, there are many areas of the law that only a lawyer can guide you through.

One area that sometimes causes people confusion is the myriad of legal terms they hear or read in agreements, contracts and decrees. To help make things a bit more clear, I have listed below a few of the many important terms and definitions used in the area of divorce law. Because getting a divorce is fraught with new and possibly intimidating terminology, retaining a qualified divorce lawyer and family law attorney is an important first step.

=============== Divorce Terms ================
 

Abandonment
Applied when one married spouse leaves the marital home, in some areas this may be grounds for divorce or may reflect adversely upon the spouse who moves.

Adultery
Sexual intercourse by a married person outside of the marriage, which in some parts of the country may be grounds for divorce or could adversely affect the offender's case.

Affidavit
A sworn written statement usually made under oath or on affirmation before a magistrate or officer (often a notary public).

Alimony
Also called maintenance or support. See Maintenance.

Alimony Pendente
Spousal support to be paid by one marital partner to the other during the pre-trial period of separation.

Contempt of Court
The deliberate failure to comply with the orders or directives of the Court.

Contested
Any issue on which the petitioner and respondent cannot agree, which must then be decided by the court.

Default
Failure to respond in the prescribed manner within a given period of time. The Respondent in a Petition for Dissolution is said to be in default if he or she failed to respond within a set period of time, usually 30 days after the date of service.

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I’ll say right off that it’s probably true that most folks think a prenuptial agreement -- or prenup, as they say in Hollywood -- will kill the romance between a couple as surely as a an illicit affair. But does suggesting that your soon-to-be spouse sign a prenuptial agreement really spell the end of trust; Certainly not. Oddly, it may just make that bond even stronger. Rather than curse or jinx a pending marriage, a prenup should be looked at as helping to cement the relationship.

Contrary to popular belief, asking your future husband or wife to sign a prenuptial agreement should not be viewed as a sign of distrust, but as a mutual act of financial openness and faith in the enduring qualities of your relationship. As a Birmingham Divorce and Family Law Attorney, I’ve represented both women and men who have entered into a prenuptial agreement with a future marriage partner.

The trouble is that many people associate the mere mention of the prenup as a prelude to a bad marriage inevitably doomed to end in divorce. Because of this, it’s really no surprise then that most folks, men and women alike, can be quite apprehensive about raising this topic with a future spouse. But there’s really nothing to fret over.

First and foremost, a prenuptial agreement is a document created between future spouses prior to their exchange of marriage vows. An agreement of this type usually lists property settlements in the event of divorce, and could include other legal issues such as possible additional obligations that could arise during the marriage. In Alabama, the law requires that certain procedures as part of the process of forming a prenup, such as full financial disclosure between the two named parties. (It’s important to remember that the law actually prohibits prenuptial agreements if they are not truthfully represented.)

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Once again Hollywood is abuzz with stories of the marital rift between Oscar-winner Sandra Bullock and so-called bad boy and biker Jesse James. With rumors of divorce now swirling around the couple, it would appear that once again even the rich and famous can end up at odds with each other, although according to the tabloids this is mostly the husband’s making.

As a Birmingham divorce lawyer and family law attorney, I have represented numerous clients across Alabama. From what I’ve seen, it makes no difference if you live in a large city such as Birmingham, Montgomery or Huntsville, or smaller municipality like Fort Payne, Fairhope or Muscle Shoals, separation and divorce can become the option of last resort for some folks. As for Ms. Bullock, this appears to be the case as well.

According to reports, Bullock has may be on course to divorce her husband of five years, with the public weighing in on the subject as well from coast to coast. The recent revelations of James’ alleged affairs with five separate women, including tattooed model Michelle McGee have apparently opened Bullocks eyes to her husband’s possible infidelity. The news of McGee’s admission that she had an alleged 11-month affair with James seems to have left little question in Bullock’s mind where she stands in the equation.

Based on new articles, close friends of the Hollywood star have said that Bullock has “definitely” made up her mind to divorce James. She has apparently been consulting a lawyer and is preparing to for divorce. Other insiders state that James is hoping that his stint in rehab and some privacy will help him recover and save his marriage.

Describing him as a “broken man,” one of James’ friends is on record as saying that James is still in love with his wife and that the whole affair has destroyed his “entire universe.”

According to news reports, 40-year-old James recently checked himself into an undisclosed treatment facility to “deal with personal issues" and to try and save his marriage. In a public apology last month, James apparently admitted to having poor judgment in regard to the extramarital affair.

 

Sandra Bullock 'definitely' wants divorce, NYDailyNews.com, April 2, 2010

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One fact of divorce in Alabama, no matter what town or city you call home -- Huntsville, Tuscaloosa, Decatur, Vestavia Hills or Talladega -- alimony and child support are a definite possibility depending on your means and the needs of your soon-to-be-ex spouse. While most individuals will fight hard not to pay alimony to a former partner, paying child support is usually accepted, albeit grudgingly by some.

As a Birmingham family law and divorce lawyer, I understand how some consider child support to be a burden, especially when that party doesn’t get to see the kids on a daily basis. Over time however, even the best provider may ask himself, “do I need to keep paying support for these nearly adult-age kids?”

The fact of the matter is that in Alabama, the age of majority is 19. What this means is that child support comes to an end once that teenager hits 19. (Be careful, though, because there is a provision for post-minority support payments when it comes to helping with college tuition and such). But for our purposes here, 19 is the age at which child support is terminated.

That being said, I have run into situations where people have asked me whether or not an 18-year-old who joins the military or otherwise is on his or her own still qualifies for child support. Does that parent’s obligation to pay support end under these kinds of circumstances?

Simply put, a parent cannot simply cease payments because they feel the child is now functioning as an autonomous individual, and neither does the child support automatically stop. However, Alabama law does provide for these kinds of situations, such as an 18-year-old joining the military.

In such instances, Alabama law allows the parent who is providing child support to file a petition with the court requesting that the child in question be declared “emancipated.” If the court agrees and the petition is granted, then the child support will usually be terminated legally.

Depending on the circumstances, it is possible that a judge will concur that the child is emancipated and subsequently grant the request for termination. Keep in mind that this is completely up to the discretion of the court and is not necessarily guaranteed . As with any family law issue, it’s wise to seek the advice of a qualified legal professional.

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Suspicion of infidelity is one of the first steps toward a broken marriage. But what if your spouse’s transgressions are not with another person, but with alcohol or drugs? Loss of love and trust through substance abuse can ruin a marriage as quickly as an affair. This is true whether you live in Montgomery, Hoover, Gadsden or Muscle Shoals.

As a Birmingham divorce lawyer and family law attorney, I’ve seen many different scenarios leading to marital disharmony -- infidelity, inappropriate sexual behavior, financial irresponsibility, alcoholism and drug abuse, just to name a few.

More than once I have been asked whether or not one or all of these problems is grounds for divorce. When it comes to drug abuse by one of the partners in a marriage, I find that occasionally the spouse who is concerned about his or her partner’s addiction may want to have that individual tested for drugs. The question is whether this is a legitimate or practical request.

Simply put, if a spouse in a divorce action is interested in having the offending partner tested for illicit or prescription drugs, that party may file a motion with the court requesting testing. At this point, the judge presiding over the divorce case will make a decision as to whether or not that motion will be granted.

In Alabama, if custody of a child or children is an issue, as well as cases involving visitation rights, the judge will usually grant a motion. Typically, there must be some basis or reason for suspecting substance abuse on the part of a spouse. If the court is convinced of that there is merit to the request, then the motion for drug testing will likely be granted.

Divorce cases can be very contentious. Because of this, it’s not uncommon to have the other party respond to the drug testing with a motion of their own for the same or similar testing. In such instances, the judge will usually order both parties in the divorce to be tested. One caveat: Don’t be too sure that you will pass a similar test. It has been known for the spouse who initiated the testing to test positive for some substance that could negatively impact your side of the divorce action.

Depending on the jurisdiction, a court may require hair follicle testing, which is reportedly more accurate than other methods and also provides results that date back farther in time. Frankly speaking, anyone who uses drugs is likely not fit to raise children in the first place, which means that if you want custody of your kids, do not use drugs. The courts are not very sympathetic when substance abuse is indicated by one or the other spouse.

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Whether you live in Huntsville, Bessemer, Tuscaloosa or any of the dozens of cities and towns throughout Alabama, picking the right divorce lawyer can make the difference between a painful and costly divorce and a smooth and equitable split. Since nearly 50 percent of all marriages end up in divorce, this it is very important to make the right choices, not only in your future spouse, but also in your divorce and family law attorney.

As an experienced Birmingham attorney well versed in divorce and family law, I have assisted many clients through what can be a harrowing and emotionally difficult time in their lives. If children are involved, then the added pain and hard feelings can compound the situation to the extent that it affects even the couple’s friends and relatives.

Choosing the right attorney can alleviate some of the emotional anguish that inevitably comes from such a legal separation. Having counseled many individuals contemplating and going through divorce, I would like to provide a few key points for finding a good divorce attorney:

1) First and foremost, choose a lawyer who specializes in family law. This goes without saying. A family law attorney should be completed prepared with the correct paperwork and forms necessary to an Alabama divorce action, which also helps to speed things along and save you time and effort.

2) Make a determination as to the gender of your attorney. Some people are more comfortable talking to a lawyer of the same sex as themselves, but you must decide for yourself.

3) Choose an attorney who is knowledgeable about and has handled case in the particular county in which your case will be heard. Having a lawyer who is familiar with the local judges and other attorneys will help you in the long run.

4) Interview your candidate to see if he or she will fight aggressively for you if the going gets nasty, as it often can. You never want to “pick fights” with your soon-to-be-ex spouse, but you do need a lawyer who understands your circumstances and will act always in your best interests.

5) Seek out friends and family members who have been divorced to get their thoughts on what to expect and who helped them the most. Divorce is no cakewalk, but you should be able to find someone in your extended circle of friends who believes that their case was handled well and in a straightforward manner.

6) Never be afraid to switch lawyers if you feel that you are not being represented in the best way. Sometimes there may simply be a clash of personalities, but whatever the reason, you need to feel comfortable with the attorney who is handling you case because it means so much to you and your family.

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As a Birmingham divorce lawyer helping clients throughout Alabama, I understand the pain and anguish that people feel following a separation or conclusion of a divorce action. For folks who share children from a marriage that is now falling apart the hurt can go very deep, especially when custody comes into play.

No matter where you live in Alabama, be it Huntsville, Auburn, Madison or Opelika, divorce and separation are not easy. One issue that arises more often than not is that of relocation. It’s a sad fact, but in a society as mobile as ours and with an economy that is forcing people to look elsewhere for employment, relocation cases have become commonplace.

Once a divorce is final, it’s inevitable to have some tension between the custodial and non-custodial parents. However, this tension can elevate if the custodial parent needs or wants to move away and take the kids with them. In cases like this the non-custodial parents will desperately want to hang on to their relationship with the children, while everyone should consider the best interests of the kids as well.

The question that I get from folks is, Where does the law come down on the issue of relocation or “move away” cases? Naturally, many non-custodial parents want to know if they can prevent their former partner from physically relocating themselves and the kids. Similarly, the custodial parent wonders if he or she actually needs to get “approval” to move from the other, non-custodial parent.

Actually, there is an Alabama statute titled the “Alabama Parent-Child Relationship Protection Act,” part of the Alabama Code, Section 30-3-160. What this part of the law requires is for the custodial parent to submit written notice to the other party, the non-custodial parent, 45 days in advance of any intended move greater than 60 miles from his or her present residence.

The law regarding this required notice is very specific as to what should be included and in what form it should take. For instance, it must be delivered via certified mail. This is why it’s always important to consult a qualified family law attorney to be certain that you are following the letter of the law.

Once notice is given, the law gives the non-custodial parent 30 days to file a written objection  with the court. If an objection is filed, the court will then set a date to hear the individual parties and make a determination as to whether or not, in the judge’s opinion, the move is in the best interests of the children.

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Let’s assume that you’re embroiled in a divorce action with your soon-to-be former spouse, who initiated the case. Whether you live in Montgomery, Dothan, Decatur, or Auburn, or anywhere in Alabama, divorce is an emotional and heart-wrenching process especially when one party doesn’t see it coming. Add children into the equation and you have potential for one of the saddest and demoralizing episodes in your life.

Being a family law and divorce attorney practicing in the Birmingham area, I have represented many clients who found themselves in the throes of a painful divorce proceeding. Part of my job is to try and make the process as easy and straightforward as possible while attempting to provide some comfort and guidance to my clients. In some instances a spouse may be so upset that they literally want to stop the divorce in its tracks.

But is this actually possible or even advisable? It’s easy to say, “I want to stop this here and now.” In reality, it’s a different story entirely here in Alabama. The sad truth is that once one spouse is committed to getting a divorce, there is no way the other party can turn it off. Short of convincing your soon-to-be-former partner to pull the plug, that’s just the way Alabama divorce law is written.

In Alabama, if one of spouse insists on a divorce, that individual is going to get his or her way no matter what. And while you and your attorney can make the divorce process take longer, you can’t stop it. As they say in the halls of divorce court, it may take two to get married, but it only takes one to get divorced.

On the topic of reconciliation, you certainly can appeal to the other party to try and make the marriage work, but most divorce actions are an indication that the marital union is probably broken and no amount of energy is going to fix it.

If you know in your heart of hearts that your marriage was on its last legs when your spouse initiated the divorce, then it may be wise to follow their lead and make the best of a bad situation. This is where a qualified divorce lawyer and family law attorney can really help.

If you insist on making it work, it’s a good idea to bring in a third party who is not emotionally torn between either spouse. Schedule some sessions with a qualified marriage counselor or church pastor. If both parties are committed to making the marriage work, then these professionals can perhaps help you toward making things work better.

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In these cash-strapped times many spouses going through divorce are asking the same question: Will I be able to receive any Alimony payments? It’s a fact that the majority of alimony awards go to the wife. As an Alabama divorce attorney and family law lawyer, I am always oncerned that my clients receive their fair share of the marital assets as part of a divorce settlement. Whether you live in Hoover or Florence, Tuscaloosa, Bessemer or Homewood, your concerns will likely be the same.

In difficult economic times, alimony and child support can both be a function of an ex-spouse’s earning power. Alimony itself is a payment from one former marital partner to the other and is usually paid on a monthly basis. It is ordered by the court as continuing support for one of the former spouses following a divorce.

You should remember that alimony is a separate and distinct payment from any other kind of divorce-related payments, such as child support. As with most aspects of divorce in Alabama, the payment of alimony is decided by a divorce judge and is determined solely by the discretion of the court. In fact, alimony payments are decided based on the specifics of the individual divorce case and the needs and means of the respective parties.

Unfortunately for the divorcing spouses, there is no fixed rule that can be applied to the setting of alimony payment, or even if alimony is justified as part of a divorce settlement. Therefore, the determination of an alimony payment, if any, is always an open issue until decided by the judge overseeing the case.

Several factors that govern how a divorce court in Alabama will decide if alimony is justified include A) the financial need of the receiving spouse (usually the wife) and the ability of the paying spouse (quite often the husband) to pay; (B) the conduct of the individual parties as pertains to the cause(s) of the divorce; and C) the length of the marriage. In the end, whether or not you receive alimony could have a great impact on your ability to preserve your personal assets going forward.

As always, a good divorce lawyer and family law attorney can assist in a large part when going through the many times painful process of divorce. Having a qualified family law attorney by your side can help when it comes time to make the big decisions that could affect your life and the lives of your children fro some times to come.
 

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To finish up my final installment of things married women in Alabama should keep in mind as they approach divorce or legal separation, I’m including a few additional points to consider in this time of emotional and financial upheaval. It makes no difference whether you live in Tuscaloosa, Birmingham, or Huntsville, the situation remains the same. Divorce is a sad fact for many women and going into it with yours eyes wide open is the best strategy for getting through with the least amount of surprises.

The decisions you make during a divorce proceeding can affect you and your kids for many years to come. The old adage, “Ignorance is Bliss,” is not the phrase you want to stand by in this case. Doing lots of research and finding an experienced divorce and family law attorney to be by your side is the best plan of action for any woman facing marital strife and ultimately, divorce.

As a Birmingham divorce attorney, my clients come first. Because my job is to help them throughout the divorce process, I also try to be there for emotional and moral support. The following are some final points to keep in mind when preparing to follow through with a divorce, or when you’re just doing some investigation for the future.

6) Hard as it may be, you must face your worst economic fears. We’ve all seen the ubiquitous “bag lady” and wondered how she arrived at that station in life. Similarly, it’s not surprising that many women experience the fear that they, too, will be left to fend for themselves, homeless on the street.

Suddenly being thrust into the position of being the sole breadwinner for your family can be a frightening prospect. Being primarily accountable for all aspects of your children’s lives going forward is a big responsibility, but don’t think you’re the only person ever to face the unknowns of post-divorce life.

Your income may come up short and the bills in the mail can seem relentless, but be assured that thousands of women every year make to this point and beyond. Just look around. You probably know more than a few divorced ladies who have faced the same challenges and still made a better life for themselves and their kids. Many became strong for the experience through the entire process.

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Previously, I touched on a couple points to remember when approaching divorce. Whether you live in Mobile, Dothan, Tuscaloosa of Huntsville, every woman going though or contemplating a divorce in Alabama should recognize some of the more common traps that people fall into during this emotionally draining time.

As a Birmingham divorce attorney, I always try to help my clients with all aspects of the divorce process. Whether you are just now thinking about becoming legally separated or already going through a divorce, you should always approach the process with a clear mind.

The following are some additional points to keep in mind when making the transition to being single again. Naturally, you should retain the services of an experienced divorce lawyer to make certain that you have covered all the areas that pertain to your circumstances.

3)  Learn early on the details of custody in Alabama. Sadly for many women going through divorce today, gone are the days of courts automatically handing over custody to the children’s mother. While preference has tended to go to the mother in the past, this is no longer the case when determining a sole or primary custodian for the kids of divorced parents.

Since there exist multiple options and variations on both custody and parenting provisions, you should perform at least as much research on child custody as you probably did when it came to your pregnancy or schooling your children. The more you know going into the divorce process, the better prepared you will be when the time comes to arguing for custody of your kids.

4)  Don’t always assume you absolutely must keep the house. This is one of the key mistakes that many women make when faced with divorce. And it’s not surprising since our homes often symbolize security and stability for the children. But temper this urge until you can truly assess the impact of keeping the house. Many times the costs can be much too high for a single parent.

Maybe you feel you can swing it, but also consider current market conditions and the state of the economy from a jobs perspective. Could you sell the house quickly and at the price you want if you lost you job? Renting has become a better option for some people ever since the economy got rough.

Do some number crunching with the help of a financial or legal advisor to determine all of the pros and cons of holding onto a home as a single parent. If you do decide to sell the house while the two of you are still married, or as part of a settlement, you can share the fix-up costs, carrying costs, brokerage fees and any capital gains tax with your spouse, rather than being solely responsible for them.

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Whether you live in Bessemer, Homewood, Huntsville or Gadsden, Alabama, any woman considering divorce should be aware of the many pitfalls out there. As a Birmingham family law and divorce attorney, my job is to help guide my clients through what can be a very emotional and taxing time. Legal separation or divorce should always be approached with a eyes wide open, which is why I suggest a few things to avoid during this critical period.

While not an exhaustive list by any means, the following are some important points that every woman should keep in mind. As always, you should consult with an Alabama divorce lawyer to be sure all aspects of you’re individual circumstances are fully addressed. In coming weeks I’ll discuss a few more points.

1)
You must face the actual realities of a divorce. Since one partner or the other spouse is usually further along the emotional road to divorce, the one who is leaving the relationship may already be gone emotionally. This means that the other partner is typically expected to catch up with this early end to their marital dream while at the same time trying to get a hold of their emotional and financial future. Many times this is too much to absorb in a short time, but ignoring reality can be rather costly.

If the husband is the one leaving the relationship, the woman is more often left to address the pain of emotional betrayal while their soon-to-be-former marital partner is busy addressing what many see as the next level of betrayal that of the family finances. The answer here is to find a competent therapist or a reliable shoulder on which to cry. Do your best to “compartmentalize” as much of the emotional aspect of your pain in order to act quickly and deliberately to protect your assets.

2)
Understand that you may, in fact, be sleeping with the enemy. When we marry our future spouse, we tend to transfer all of our trust to that person -- the one we fell in love with. In most marriages, one spouse typically handles the finances while the other handles day-to-day household operations, such as feeding the kids and taking them to soccer practice and dance recitals.

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By now most everyone in Alabama, from Montgomery County to Mobile and all around the state, has heard the news of Elizabeth and John Edwards’ separation following the husband's not-so-secret affair that destroyed the couple’s marriage of 32 years. Elizabeth Edwards announced that she is separated from the former presidential hopeful and plans to move on with her life by putting such a difficult and hurtful event behind her. Can divorce be far behind for these two?

As a Birmingham divorce lawyer and family law attorney, this kind of scenario plays out across Alabama every year, so it’s no surprise that even the rich and famous get caught in the infidelity game more often than not. As for Edwards, her story is doubly sad due to her previous diagnosis of stage four breast cancer. Whatever the circumstances, the cheating spouse usually makes a mistake along the way that exposes him or her to the light of day.

On more than one occasion, I myself have been asked by potential clients what they should do if and when they suspect their spouse is cheating. There are a couple things that someone can do when contemplating a divorce of a spouse who might be having an affair on the side.

For starters, one must definitely think about retaining a private investigator to do some research into suspicious activities. In Alabama, having proof that a spouse has been cheating may have a direct affect on the property settlement in a divorce case. Fault grounds can also affect the amount of alimony the court grants to the injured party.

Furthermore, depending on whether the couple has children who were affected by the offending spouse’s conduct, this too may influence the court’s determination when it comes to custody of the kids.

A second and equally important step would be to have yourself tested for any sexually transmitted diseases (STDs). While this can be a difficult thing to face, it is very important for your own well-being and peace of mind. The sooner you find out if you have contracted an STD, the sooner you can be treated if necessary.

If you have been diagnosed with an STD, this can also significantly affect the direction fo the divorce proceedings and may be the basis of additional legal claims against the offending spouse. An experienced divorce and family law attorney is invaluable in any legal separation or divorce action and will be able to advise you on this and other issues connected with your case.

How He Got Caught, Slate.com, January 29, 2010

 

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How much information is too much information? Going through a divorce in Alabama can be a difficult journey. Regardless of whether you live in Mobile, Birmingham, Huntsville or any of the hundreds of cities and towns across the state, the subject of divorce or legal separation can be a minefield. Spouses who are splitting up have a hard enough time discussing details with family and friends, but what of the children? How much should you share with them, if anything?

As a Birmingham Divorce Attorney practicing throughout Alabama, I have seen it all when it comes to separation and divorce. I feel the heartbreak and sense the hard feelings that can arise during this kind of life-changing event. But my knowledge and years of experience have given me the tools to help my clients make it through one of the toughest times of their life.

For sure, one of the most difficult aspects of divorce is the effect it can have on children. Divorce can be extremely trying especially where kids are involved. In many instances, my clients confide in me by asking how they should break the news to their children. Quite often, they don’t even know how they should act or behave toward their kids once a divorce has been finalized.

Of course, it can be difficult to take your children’s needs into account during the process of a divorce in Alabama. There are many and varied aspects to the process including Spousal support, division of assets, and guardianship.

If you are considering divorce, or know someone who is going through or contemplating such an action, you may want to keep the following items in mind regarding the younger members of the household. Children need and have the right to the following, especially in times of family upheaval:

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Last week I discussed an approach to achieving a mutual divorce settlement vis-à-vis No-fault divorce. As a Birmingham divorce attorney who has represented dozens of individuals going through what must be one of the most difficult times in any married person’s life, I can say that cooperation is one of the best ways to make a divorce proceeding go smoothly.

Frankly, in Alabama or anywhere else for that matter, separation and divorce can be life-altering events that tear at the hearts and emotions of the spouses affected, not to mention their families and even friends. Maintaining a cool approach, as hard as it may be, is one of the best things you can do for yourself at this difficult time.

Previously, I talked about how to make the process work. Here, I’m going to review the “mechanics” of a No-fault divorce here in Alabama. Before I start, I’ll remind folks again that it is essential for both parties to avoid any hostile or accusatorial tone if they wish the divorce process to go smoothly. Stay calm and you will have a much better opportunity to settle your differences and move on with your separate lives.

As for the legal grounds for an Alabama No-fault divorce includes the following:

1. An incompatibility of temperament that results in the two parties’ inability to live together
2. An irreversible and permanent breakdown of the marital union, which makes any attempts at reconciliation either impractical, futile, or not in the best interests of the two spouses or the family in general
3. The voluntary abandonment by one of the spouses from bed and board for one year preceding the filing of the divorce complaint

To initiate a No-fault divorce in Alabama, one of the above reasons must be specified on a state document (Complaint for Divorce) and filed with the court. Following this, and having agreed to avoid personal attacks and accusations, the two parties should be ready and willing to accept the legal reasons for a No-fault divorce. Now it is time to meet with your individual attorneys to discuss the details of the marriage dissolution.

After accepting the reasons for the divorce, both spouses should be prepared to discuss three specific areas that must be addressed and agreed to before the dissolution of the marriage. These areas include the following:

• Community finances
• Assets 
• Children

 

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One of the more frequent causes of divorce can usually be summed up in one word: Incompatibility. As a divorce lawyer practicing in the Birmingham area, I can say that many divorces are the result of an unpleasant or contentious marital relationship. However, this doesn’t mean that the divorce process or the court proceedings surrounding it must necessarily be fraught with acrimony and bitterness.

While the primary job of a divorce and family law attorney is to fight for his or her client’s best interests, it is important that a lawyer also be compassionate and provide a buffer between the client and the other party. Nothing is gained by getting angry during a divorce action, so this is always something to keep in mind.

Now the question I will pose here is, can there be any such thing as a  friendly divorce? Fortunately for many people, the answer is yes. Because Alabama is a No-Fault (also known as uncontested) divorce state, regardless of whether you live in large cities such as Birmingham and Montgomery, or any of the other smaller cities and towns throughout Alabama, an individual can usually obtain a divorce without too many legal complications.

There is a caveat here: you and your spouse must agree to the terms of the divorce in an amicable and friendly manner. This is critical as any history of domestic violence in a marital relationship could easily derail a friendly divorce and could even make things worse. Therefore, if there is a history of domestic violence it is highly recommended that you retain professional legal counsel when pursuing a No-Fault divorce in Alabama.

Once you and your spouse realize the marriage is over, and if you can get past that initial shock and anger of realizing there is no going back, then you may have a chance to honestly look at a No-Fault divorce for your situation.

This can only happen if both parties act in a mature and responsible manner. Try to keep things on a friendly basis, because these is no reason for anything hostile or antagonistic to happen during this time. A key here is to avoid resurrecting the reasons why you are getting a divorce in the first place. Keep it civil and your chances of getting through the proceedings will improve dramatically.

Frankly speaking, if your differences are irreconcilable, then these individual reasons will only be impediments to achieving an amicable and “friendly” resolution. Keeping this in mind and seeking the services of a qualified and experienced family law and divorce attorney will help you get through the divorce and on to a new and better life for yourself and your family.

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A fight over child custody can be a painful and wrenching experience for any family. As an Alabama family law attorney and divorce lawyer in the Birmingham area, I have seen the emotional torrent that swirls around all parties in hotly contested custody battles. In the case of former vice-presidential hopeful Sarah Palin’s grandson, Tripp, hopefully the child’s young age will at least spare him from most of the drama.

Recently, news agencies have been talking about the latest saga of Bristol Palin and her former boyfriend and fiancée, Levi Johnston. According to reports, Johnston has been on a so-called campaign against Alaska’s former “first family” by revealing a variety of family secrets.

Regarding the recent custody case over young Tripp, public records from an Alaskan court have revealed a heated battle between Palin's daughter and the father of her grandson. Bristol Palin had asked the court to keep the proceedings closed, but that request was denied a Superior Court judge -- a temporary order had authorized the use of pseudonyms while the court was considering the request, which stated that no good "could result to the child by an onslaught of media."

Johnston’s stance was that he didn’t feel protected against Sarah Palin in a closed setting. The father of one-year-old Tripp had been pushing for open court proceedings, saying he just wanted a simple case based on its merit. A qualified family law attorney can be a great asset in cases not unlike this one

According to news articles, Bristol Palin had petitioned the court in early November last year, asking for sole custody as well as child support. The petition also requested a visitation schedule for Johnston, saying that the former fiance had exercised "sporadic visitation rights."

The eldest daughter of Sarah Palin, Bristol Palin's custody petition called Johnston's recent nude photo shoot for Playgirl magazine "risque." She also noted that the man’s mother, Sherry Johnston, should not be allowed unsupervised visits with the baby following her drug arrest. Sherry Johnston, who is reportedly serving a three-year sentence under home confinement, was again sentenced last month on a guilty plea to one count of possession with intent to deliver the painkiller OxyContin.

In a motion opposing closed proceedings, Johnston's attorney argued that Bristol Palin had not shown what sort of evidence could stigmatize the child. The lawyer said that the Palin-Johnston case has similar facts that accompany open child custody cases every day in the Alaskan court system.

 

Bristol Palin seeks full custody of baby, MSN.com, December 29, 2009

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In the recent maelstrom of mistress allegations, Tiger Woods may be headed to divorce court if the gossip pages are correct. As a Birmingham divorce and family law attorney, I have first-hand experience with divorce and separation cases involving infidelity in a marriage. While Mr. Woods’ situation is perhaps more extreme than most, the result -- a wife deciding to consult a divorce lawyer -- is nothing new in my profession.

Revelations of a single or as in this case multiple affairs can quickly push a marriage toward divorce or, at best, legal separation. Sports figures, entertainers and other personalities can sometimes be more prone to marital troubles than the rest of us, it’s a big let down to those who revere these high-profile names.

In this case, according to various news reports, Elin Nordegren is planning to divorce the fallen golf icon. That piece of information came from a source, who recently spoke to People magazine, adding that Nordegren has “made up her mind." More damning is the reports from the New York Daily News, which reported that the 29-year-old Nordegren and husband Tiger would be “going their separate ways for the holidays.”

The article says that the former model will be heading to Sweden with the couple’s two children, while Woods will be staying home. According to reports, the golfer is looking for a “safe harbor” and waiting for the storm to settle. He reportedly will be spending the holidays with two or three of his male friends.

Reports also state that a friend of Woods claims the golf great had likely cheated on Nordegren with more than the dozen or so women who have already emerged since Thanksgiving. The latest news reports allege that Woods wired thousands of dollars every month to several women, with one receiving up to $20,000 a month, according to MSNBC.

 

Tiger Woods' wife Elin Nordegren ready for divorce: report, NYDailyNews.com, December 16, 2009

 

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As a Birmingham, AL, divorce lawyer and family law attorney I get many questions from clients regarding all aspects of divorce, separation, child custody and other divorce-related topics. This is a difficult time for all parties in a divorce, but there are some key topics that concern many a spouse and parent affected by legal separation and especially divorce, namely visitation rights.

What is Standard Visitation?
Depending on where you live in Alabama, you may have questions on what is standard visitation for any minor children involved in a divorce. While the custodial parent has little concern in this area, in my experience shows that the non-custodial parent is the one who is almost always anxious about the court’s decision regarding visitation.

In theory, most domestic relations and/or juvenile court judges have very wide latitude when it comes to visitation schedules. In fact, the court usually decides on a case-by-case basis what is best for the children. Depending on the facts and circumstances, the visitation schedule for one couple can be very different from that of another.

While there exist visitation guidelines, it is widely understood that most judges settle on their own “standard visitation” schedules, which they place in their orders. Because each judge has rather wide discretion to fashion a special visitation schedule for a particular couple, the parties going through the divorce should be prepared for certain deviations. This is why it is always advisable to retain the services of a qualified divorce and family law attorney.

It is also important to note that even the final order can vary slightly from the basic order. For instance, in one jurisdiction a Wednesday night could maybe be added if the parties ask for it, but the court may not allow much more that that, in spite of any agreements between the two parties. However in an adjoining county, you may well find that a Wednesday night is already part of the standard order.

In the end, divorcing parents will find that cooperation is the best approach when it comes to visitation. This is because the visitation order usually only applies when the parties cannot agree on their own schedule -- serving as a minimum allotment of time for the non-custodial parent to get his or her share of visitation. But if you both can agree on your a mutual schedule, then your are free to create and follow that no matter what the judge’s order states.
 

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When considering divorce it is always a good idea to find a qualified family law attorney or divorce lawyer to help guide you through the labyrinth of laws and legal requirements. As a Birmingham divorce attorney I look out for the best interests of my clients went representing them in divorce court. Whether you are a husband or wife, this is a stress-filled time for many people, and my approach to compassionate representation during all phases of legal separation, divorce, child custody and other marital and post-marital agreements remains one of sympathetic, yet aggressive advocacy.

My years of experience in divorce-related and family law matters has equipped me to provide the necessary counsel during one of the most trying times in a person’s life. Here are some additional legal terms you may run across when facing a divorce or separation in the state of Alabama.

Alimony, Maintenance, Spousal Support
The awarding of alimony is determined by the court based on the need of the spouse requesting alimony and the ability of the other to pay. If fault is a factor in the divorce, the judge has the right to make an allowance to either spouse out of the estate of either spouse, or not make an allowance as the circumstances of the case may justify. However, any property acquired prior to the marriage of the parties or by inheritance or gift may not be considered in determining the amount of alimony.

Child Custody
Child support is determined using the Income Shares model, with the theory that children should continue to receive that same amount of support as if the parents were still together.

Child Custody
The courts in Alabama strives to assure that minor children have frequent and continuing contact with parents who have shown the ability to act in the best interest of their children and to encourage parents to share in the rights and responsibilities of rearing their children after the parents have separated or dissolved their marriage. The court shall in every case consider joint custody, however it may award any form of custody which is determined to be in the best interest of the child.

Joint custody does not necessarily mean equal physical custody. In determining whether joint custody is in the best interest of the child, courts typically consider the same factors considered in awarding sole legal and physical custody and all of the following factors:

1. The agreement or lack of agreement of the parents on joint custody
2. The past and present ability of the parents to cooperate with each other and make decisions jointly
3. The ability of the parents to encourage the sharing of love, affection, and contact between the child and the other parent
4. Any history of or potential for child abuse, spouse abuse, or kidnapping
5. The geographic proximity of the parents to each other as this relates to the practical considerations of joint physical custody

 

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The causes for divorce are many, but one of the primary reasons couples in Alabama get divorced is due to issues surrounding money. Whether it’s poor financial planning, excessive spending by one or both spouses or simply constant disagreement over household financial priorities, money can be the bane of a marital relationship. A surprisingly large percentage of people who become legally separated, as well as those who actually go through divorce, will tell you that money was the culprit.

As a Birmingham family law and divorce attorney, I’ll add that it’s not just money, but the lack of communication about money that trips people up. A good marriage thrives on communication. Lack of communication hardly ever helps a relationship survive and often leads to divorce.

A recent New York Times article addressed this subject. There are several things to keep in mind when approaching the subject of household finances. Whether you’re living together and planning to get married, or married already, these pointers may make the difference in whether or not your future together will be relatively smooth going or rocky from the start.

Money: Topics of Conversation

1. Explore with your partner each other’s background as it applies to financial education. Did your parents teach you about money and personal finances? And what is your “financial philosophy”?
2. Talk about credit. Does each person know his or her credit score? Be honest about why your score may be low or how it could be improved. How can your credit scores and credit history affect your future as a married couple? Will they affect your goals?
3. Discuss who will take the lead in handling the family finances. Who handles it now? And who will decide how much each person can spend in order to maintain a positive cash flow for the family?
4. Talk about where you want to be financially in five years. Where do you want to be in 10 or 20 years? And what are your individual goals for retirement?

Marital Finances: For Richer, For Poorer
It’s hard to get through modern life these days without money, but when two people commit legally to each other, as with a marriage, each other’s finances become tied together, legally. A couple looking toward marriage should consider how the future combining of that pool of savings, income and finances will affect their life together. It can make for a smooth transition to a happy and growing marital relationship.

As a divorce lawyer in Alabama, I’ve seen the result of poor financial planning and bad money management and how these can negatively impact a marriage. Love may be the reason you got together, but money can be your undoing. My advice is to be open and talk about each other’s wants and needs. You may find that it’s liberating and takes the guesswork out of planning for your happy future together.

 

Money Talks to Have Before Marriage, NYTimes.com, October 23, 2009

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In Alabama, as in other parts of the country, there are certain issues that accompany divorce. As a Birmingham divorce and family law attorney, my office handles all aspects of legal separation, divorce, marital agreements and other legal matters affecting couples in Birmingham and the surrounding area. Anyone with kids who is going through or contemplating a divorce should consider the laws governing custody and visitation rights.

Custody in Alabama
The law provides for three different types of child custody: That of temporary custody, physical custody and, of course, legal custody. In Alabama, the courts typically encourage folks to share responsibility for their children by ordering joint custody whenever practical and physically possible. However, numerous factors must be considered before making this judgment.

It’s important to note that the courts in Birmingham, Montgomery and other cities and towns throughout the state are always able to deviate from the general rule as long as it is in the best interest of the child (or children).

Temporary Custody
This approach to custody, temporary, is exactly what it sounds like. Usually when a couple with children at home files for a divorce, the court will automatically enter and order for temporary child custody. This is just for the duration of the proceedings so that the children’s immediate interests are addressed, but the final custody decision always overrides this order at the conclusion of the divorce. The marital agreement should include the court’s final custody and visitation order.

Legal Custody
The final marital agreement will include a legal child custody order. Joint legal custody means that both parents make the major decisions that affect any children the couple may have. Naturally, the courts look for a cooperative attitude between the parents to ensure that the decisions will be made jointly and in the best interest of the children.

Alabama Joint Custody
An important point to make here is that the State of Alabama has a policy, which is governed by Alabama law that encourages the court to order joint custody in all custody cases, but allows the courts to deviate from that rule if it is in the best of the children.
If it deviates a court wishes to deviate from public policy, the court must state its findings in the record.

These are all practical considerations for any spouse to consider when children are involved. I always encourage people in this difficult time of their lives to consult early with a qualified divorce and family law attorney. A qualified legal expert can explain the various forms of custody, and answer any other questions you may have about divorce, custody or visitation orders.

 

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One of the biggest concerns among parents going through a divorce is the law’s affect on the custody of the children. In this respect, couples without kids have less to worry about, but having a qualified family law and divorce attorney at your side is the first step toward a better outcome. Here in Birmingham, and across Alabama as well, the courts have a great deal of discretion when it comes to child custody cases.

In any custody proceeding, the child or children in question become wards of the court, and as such the court is entirely concerned with any issues affecting those children. For example, in Ex parte Divine, the Alabama Supreme Court listed a dozen factors that must be considered when deciding upon the best interests of a child during a custody proceeding. These include:

• Sex and age(s) of the child or children
• Emotional, social, moral, material and educational needs of each child
• Type of home environment offered by each parent
• Each parent’s age, character, stability, and mental and physical health
• The individual parent’s capacity and interest in providing for the emotional, social, etc., needs of child or children
• Relationship between each child and each parent
• Relationship between the children themselves
• Effect on the children that disrupting, or continuing, an existing custodial arrangement would possibly cause
• Any preference(s) of child or children, assuming they are of sufficient age and maturity
• Recommendations of experts
• Any available alternatives
• Any relevant matters

Understand that past performance is often quite crucial in the court’s determination as to custody of a child. However, a spouse's prior performance may not be an accurate portrait of their future performance once the realities of a divorce become known. For example, a spouse who used to work at home taking care of the kids may not be able to stay home full-time once the divorce is final. This happens frequently as the financial situation of one of the two parents usually changes substantially after the divorce. The same can be said for his or her time constraints and other realities, which may have changed as well.

Because of this, the court has ultimate power in determining the custody situation with each child during the proceedings. This is just one more reason why my firm advocates divorce mediation and collaborative legal processes whenever possible. Parents should be the ones determining your child's best interests, not the courts.

 

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Marriage is a sacred institution which sometimes becomes a trial for those ill-suited to the needs of another, or the sacrifices which a marital partnership requires. As a Birmingham divorce lawyer and family law attorney, I have helped many couples through their individual rough patches. Unfortunately, even the best of counseling cannot hold together a relationship that has fallen apart. That is when legal separation or actual divorce become the only alternative, sad to say.

To begin, in Alabama a valid marriage is marked by a number of conditions. Each of these, and as a group, helps to define what is or is not a legal marriage in the state of Alabama. They include the following:

• Nobody under 14 years of age has the capacity to contract marriage
• For all persons under the age of 18, the consent of a parent or guardian is absolutely required
• Both parties to the marriage must be of sound mind
• Each must be able to contract marriage, and
• The parties cannot be related, at least within a prohibited degree as defined by the state

The Alabama Marriage Protection Act, which was made into law in 1998, specifies that marriage is an inherently unique relationship between a man and a women. A marriage contracted between individuals of the same sex is invalid in Alabama. ALA. CODE 30-1-19(b) (1975). Furthermore, the act also holds that the State of Alabama shall not recognize the marriage of parties of the same sex from other states.

Finally, a marriage cannot exist without the mutual consent of both parties. Since consent is lacking if a previous marriage existed, or when consent is procured by duress, a marriage is not valid when obtained under either circumstance. This is when my work as a divorce lawyer must inevietably come into play. Divorce legally separates and divides a family's assets, and in some cases it actually divides the family. But this is a discussion for another time.

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With an apparent trend lower in the divorce rate across the country and likely in Alabama as well, many couples might feel that cohabitation is a viable alternative to marriage. As a Birmingham family law and divorce attorney, I know the pitfalls of this kind of approach to a long-term relationship. When it comes to separation and divorce, one or both of the parties in a live-in relationship may think they are avoiding the complications associated with a traditional marriage, but you might be surprised to know that this may not be the case here in Alabama.

Certainly, it seems that on the surface cohabitation free one party from any legal responsibility to the other in cases where the relationship doesn’t work out and the two people part ways. However, Alabama is one of the few states that still recognizes common law marriage, which is defined roughly as a union between two people not formalized in the customary manner as prescribed by law but created by an agreement to marry followed by cohabitation.

Furthermore, cohabitating couples in Alabama may be shocked to learn that they could already be married in the eyes of the law, and with that, be affected by the same laws that pertain to other, legally married couples in terms of divorce, spousal and child support, division of property and other aspects of a divorce. Even if divorce is not the issue, there are other aspects that may be of particular importance to one or the other party, such as property ownership, rights of survivorship, spousal benefits, and other marital amenities.

Although common law marriage is prohibited in most parts of the United States, the Full Faith and Credit Clause of the U.S. Constitution requires all states that prohibit it to nonetheless recognize a common law marriage created in a jurisdiction that allows it, such as Alabama. In fact, the laws in all states require a common-law spouse to obtain a divorce before remarrying.

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As a Birmingham divorce and family law attorney, I have counseled many clients on the pros and cons of legal separation and divorce. Here in Alabama, the frequency of divorce is still the highest in the nation, but overall the rates of separation and divorce in cities such as Birmingham and Montgomery mirror that of the rest of the U.S. -- according to reports, people are divorcing less frequently than ever before. But why is this?

As an Alabama divorce lawyer, I've heard a number of theories. Some suggest that folks are just not getting married as often. Instead, couples are choosing to together -- this may be true, since research has proven that the number of couples living together has increased by a factor of ten since 1960.

Another school of though is that many married couples include a higher percentage of college educated people. The thinking here is that in such families both parties may work, reducing financial stress, and allowing the couples to remain married. Finally, some sociologists suggest that in some parts of the country the stigma of being divorced has increased, which may force couples in these areas to work harder to stay married. This may have a significant impact on some, but the media may also be a factor.

As we have seen on TV, in the newspapers and online, more and more politicians, celebrities and other famous, high profile people who have revealed their indiscretions also seem to have spouses who are willing to “stick it out” to make the marriage work.

We’ve seen it here in Alabama and in our nation’s capital. Folks like South Carolina’s Governor Mark Sanford, former presidential candidate John Edwards, and recently resigned Tennessee Senator Paul Stanley. In each case, either the man or his wife said they planned to work on saving their marriages. Now, data on divorce and infidelity suggest that something similar is happening between lesser-known couples more often than people suspect.

While the divorce rate appears to be down, the percentage of married people who report having cheated on their spouse has remained about the same. While sociologists and demographers offer a variety of possible explanations - including a decline in the number of married people and people waiting until they're older to marry - many point to the economic downturn to explain how spouses respond to infidelity.

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Divorce strikes every socio-economic group, every religion and every race. Here in Alabama, be it Birmingham, Montgomery, Huntsville or Mobile, and thoughout this great country of ours, legal separation and divorce also plagues our military personnel. Serving the United States of America is one of the greatest honors an American can experience, but being a part of our armed forces also requires great sacrifice. Tours of duty in faraway and often hostile lands put great strains on married couples and the families of these dedicated soldiers.

As a compassionate Birmingham family law and divorce attorney, I’ve seen the heartache of divorce firsthand. No one wants to go there, but as hard as it is to hear, divorce remains a fact of life for many of our service men and woman. Every branch of the U.S. Military has its share of sad stories of families torn apart. My job, as an Alabama divorce lawyer is to make certain that the process is as simple and pain free as possible, while keeping my client’s best interests at heart.

An important point to remember, as a member of the military seeking a divorce, is not to use the same attorneys that assisted your civilian friends or relatives. This is because military personnel and their spouses are subject to a special set of laws that don't apply to ordinary divorces. Furthermore, military divorces are complicated by the physical distances between the parties, especially if one or both spouses are on active duty and stationed overseas or in another state.

For these reasons alone military people need a divorce attorney with special expertise in the state and federal laws that apply to military divorce. My office offers assistance to military personnel in Alabama from all branches of the service, as well as their spouses. This includes divorces between couples who live permanently in Alabama and those stationed in Alabama, as well as representation of people who can't be physically present in Alabama.

Occasionally, these individuals have special circumstances, due to their military service. One of the unusual aspects of military divorce is that these families tend to move frequently and may have a choice of states in which to file -- this allows them and their attorneys to choose the state whose laws best fit their situation. This can make a huge difference in the outcome of a divorce settlement.

From the complications of serving a spouse with divorce papers, to determining support, alimony and property division, choosing the proper divorce lawyer for your personal situation is critical. This is why I always tell fiends and family who have loved ones serving in the U.S. Military to be mindful when contemplating divorce or separation. Your future happiness and welfare could be on the line.

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While it is never an easy decision, there are many good reasons for getting a divorce in Alabama. Whether you reside in Montgomery, Huntsville, Mobile or any one of the dozens of small towns throughout our state, financial matters and basic incompatibility are common complaints leading to separation and divorce. But as a Birmingham family law and divorce lawyer, I can easily say that domestic abuse, either between the two marriage partners or between one of the parents and the children, is by far the most serious reasons behind any divorce action.

Child abuse is particularly awful. In Alabama, physical abuse as it pertains to children can mean several things. Per Alabama Code 26-14-1(1)-(3), physical harm or threatened harm to the health or welfare of a child can be through:

1. Non-accidental physical injury
2. Sexual abuse or attempted sexual abuse
3. Sexual exploitation or attempted sexual exploitation

The state statutes also provide for emotional abuse, which is defined by Alabama state law as being non-accidental mental injury.

Similarly neglect, according to the state of Alabama, is defined as the negligent treatment or maltreatment of a child, including the failure to provide adequate food, clothing, shelter, medical treatment, or supervision. It is important to mention that Alabama provides an exception to the area of neglect in Alabama Code 26-14-7.2, which states that a parent who fails to provide medical treatment to a child due to the legitimate practice of religious beliefs shall not be considered negligent for that reason alone. This exception shall not preclude a court from ordering that medical services be provided to the child.

Finally, sexual abuse is one of the most egregious offenses that a spouse can perpetrate on another family member, especially a child within the family circle. In Alabama, child sexual abuse includes the flowing:

1. The employment, use, persuasion, inducement, enticement, or coercion of any child to engage in any sexually explicit conduct, or
2. Having a child assist any other person to engage in any sexually explicit conduct
3. Any simulation of the conduct for the purpose of producing any visual depiction of the conduct
4. The rape, molestation, prostitution, or other form of sexual exploitation of children
5.  Incest with children

In general, sexual exploitation is defined as allowing, permitting, or encouraging a child to engage in prostitution; allowing, permitting, encouraging, or engaging in the obscene or pornographic photographing, filming, or depicting of a child for commercial purposes.

No matter what your situation -- separation, contested divorce, mediated divorce, etc. -- choosing a qualified family law and divorce lawyer is the first step to a better life for you and your children. Don’t settle for just good enough when it comes to your future happiness and security. Do your homework and choose your divorce attorney wisely. For more information on child welfare issues, visit the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services' child welfare website.

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These days it’s not hard to find families in distress. Divorce and separation loom large as people face a variety of stress factors that make for a daunting day-to-day existence for many married couples. Along with all the other challenges of married life, the current world economic situation has created more difficulties. From Birmingham and Huntsville to Montgomery and Mobile, we can all see it. As an Alabama divorce lawyer and family law attorney, I hear on a daily basis the hardships taken on by many married couples around our state.

Anybody who has ever been married knows that trouble with the family finances can easily trigger marital discord. In fact, financial stress is one of the most common factors leading to divorce. The past couple years have been extremely difficult, even for the most well-adjusted couples. Everyone is feeling the pressure and uncertainty of the global economy.

Some things cannot be controlled, but one point to keep in mind is that when family problems lead to divorce, it can be very tough on a person's finances. Of course, divorce itself can add to your costs, such as legal fees, a possible second residence and sometimes shared custody or support orders.

This is a lot to consider, especially if you are already in debt. Any additional financial obligations can quickly become overwhelming. With constant calls from creditors, some people begin to feel trapped to the point of filing for bankruptcy. But bankruptcy can also greatly impact certain aspects of your divorce.

For instance, which proceeding you file first can change what you own and owe under the law. Following a divorce, the language used in the divorce decree can even determine whether spouses' debts to one another are wiped out by the bankruptcy. If you're considering a bankruptcy during or after divorce, or if your former spouse is considering it, you must speak with a qualified family law attorney. I cannot stress this enough.

In a nutshell, most people have two options open to them. In a Chapter 7, or liquidation, bankruptcy, a person sells all of his or her assets they can in order to pay off your creditors. Any remaining bills are then forgiven. In a Chapter 13, or restructuring, bankruptcy, a person chooses to keep their assets while making a plan to gradually repay their creditors over a three- to five-year period.

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Divorce. It can be messy. It’s never easy. And many folks have been there. One thing I can tell you without hesitation, as an experienced Alabama divorce lawyer, you sometimes have to make a compromise to get the best outcome. Working out of Birmingham, AL, I’ve represented numerous spouses seeking separation or divorce. An uncontested divorce is not uncommong, but many divorces are fraught with challenges from both sides. Many of my past clients believed that mediation was out of the question, mainly because they were totally in the right and there “less-than-better-half” was completely in the wrong.

One thing you must consider when contemplating this kind of all-or-nothing approach is that the court may not agree with you. But listening to your divorce attorney is the best thing you can do. I and other family law attorneys across the state of Alabama know how divorce court functions. Whether you’re here in Birmingham, or out in Tuscaloosa, in and around Bessemer, or over by Gadsden, you’ll hear similar advice. Knowing when to compromise, versus taking your divorce to trial, is critical to a successful and satisfying outcome.

A family law attorney can guide you through a divorce with better judgment than if you drive the bus yourself. Without compromise, you will likely have to take your divorce case to trial, which in itself can be a difficult decision for any husband or wife. At the same time, by going to trial you are taking your chances not only with the outcome, but also with the cost -- in terms of time and money -- of extended litigation.

I’ll be the first to acknowledge that no person involved in a divorce wants to consent to an agreement that does not fully protect his or her property rights, future financial security or the custody of the children, if any. But naturally, if you do to go to trial with your divorce case, you will definitely benefit from an experienced and dedicated attorney by your side who will passionately advocate for the protection of your rights and seek the best possible results on your behalf.

So if you’re contemplating divorce, please consider the realities of your situation and try to put your emotions on the back burner. A little anger is healthy, but too much can cloud your thinking and cause you to make choices that you may regret later on. Pay attention to what your lawyer has to say. His or her opinion can be more valuable than you might imagine.
 

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Even as a Birmingham divorce and family law attorney, I personally hate to see people get divorced. For the children of parents going through a divorce, for the other family members and even for the couple’s friends and neighbors, it’s a very difficult and stressful time. But there are instances when I have no qualms about recommending divorce and that is where domestic violence is involved. I cannot tolerate spousal abuse, and I’m certain every thinking person out there cannot either.

Did you know that each year, nearly four million women are physically assaulted by their partner in the United States? That’s an awful statistic, and worthy of some serious thought. While most divorces have more to do with some form of incompatibility, a fair number are in response to violence. Of course, domestic violence doesn’t always have to be physical in nature. I’ve represented more than a few clients whose spouses used a psychological approach to antagonize and abuse their wife, or husband.

Every week we hear news stories of physical violence that can arise during a marriage, but even afterward the abuser can reach out to the victim again and again. Recently, I ran across a positive story of a domestic abuse survivor who says that in sharing her story, she hopes to keep others from having the same fate as many tragic victims of domestic violence. This woman was physically attacked by her abuser, who literally was trying to kill her.

The television report provided important warnings on how other victims can hopefully avoid a similar situation. For instance, they advise that one should never meet with their abuser in private. Seemingly innocent excuses can be a smokescreen meant to fool the victim into meeting, such as asking a former spouse to stop by to feed a family pet. It can be a dangerous lure.

Bottom line: When it comes to domestic abuse, avoid all contact with the other party -- take advantage of caller ID and simply don’t answer the phone when he calls. And if you’re not certain how to start, by all means contact an experienced family law attorney to find out your rights and how to legally protect yourself and your children.

 

Surviving Domestic Violence, NBCAugusta.com, June 22, 2009

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As a Birmingham Divorce Attorney, I have seen the good and the bad when it comes to divorce in Alabama. I know the heartbreak and hard feelings that can arise during life-changing events such as separation and divorce. My knowledge and experience give me the tools to help clients through those roughest of times.

One thing that makes my job both difficult and rewarding is the children. Divorce is very trying especially when kids are involved, and I’ve had many clients confide in me that they didn’t know how to break the news to their children, or even how to behave toward their kids once all was said and done. But youngsters are resilient, and if anything, parents must remember that children, as members of the family, have rights and deserve your respect.

It is sometimes hard to take into account a child’s needs amidst all the other aspects of a divorce, such as division of assets, spousal support and guardianship. Therefore, if you are considering divorce, or know someone who is going through or contemplating such an action, you may want to keep the following list in mind regarding the younger members of the household. Kids need and have the right to the following, especially in times of family upheaval:

• Being free of the conflict between the parents
• Developing and maintaining an independent relationship with each parent
• Being free from having to take over the parental responsibility for making custody and/or visitation decisions
• Being free from having to take sides with, defend, or lessen the value of either parent
• Being guided, taught, supervised, disciplined and nurtured by each parent, without interference from the other parent
• Being financially supported by both parents, regardless of how much time is spent with each parent
• Spending time with each parent, regardless of whether or not financial support is given
• Having a personal sleeping area and space for possessions in each parent’s home
• Being physically safe and adequately supervised when in the care of each parent
• Having a stable, consistent and responsible child care arrangement when not supervised by the parents
• Developing and maintaining meaningful relationships with other significant adults, as long as these relationships do not interfere with or replace the children’s primary relationship with their parents
• Expecting that both parents will follow through with the child care plan, honoring specific commitments for scheduled time with the children
• Expecting that both parents stay informed about medical, dental, educational and legal matters concerning the children, unless such disclosure would prove harmful to the children
• Expecting that their parents will consider any special needs (developmental, mental, emotional or physical) they might have when arranging a child care plan
• Participating in age-appropriate activities so long as these activities do not significantly impair their relationship with either parent

Should you need professional legal advice on divorce, child custody or any other area of family law, we at Eversole Law are ready, willing and able to help. We have the expertise and compassion to guide you through this difficult time.

 

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Divorce requires proper financial planning.  This statement seems obvious but is often overlooked by many inexperienced divorce practitioners.  While property division, child support and alimony are often negotiated, other equally important aspects of divorce planning may go overlooked.  Life insurance is an often overlooked aspect of divorce proceedings.  For instance, what happens if the person required to pay alimony or child support dies?  An article detailing these exact divorce planning concerns can be found here.  As a practicing Alabama divorce and family law attorney and lawyer, I always insist that my divorce clients are protected from such an eventuality, by making sure those responsible for child support payments or alimony are required to maintain a life insurance policy. 

This is just one more reason why anyone considering a divorce should contact an experienced Alabama divorce and family lawyer.  Divorce is not a simple matter and should be undertaken only by an attorney or law firm that focuses its practice on Alabama divorce law.  A good Alabama divorce lawyer must understand taxes, be a financial planner, understand the myriad aspects of divorce law, including child support, alimony, child visitation, child custody etc., and must be an aggressive litigator and excellent communicator.   

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I filed a contempt of court proceeding today against a client's husband who violated a Pendente Lite Relief custody order.  Pendente Lite is just a fancy Latin way of saying temporary relief.  This temporary relief is granted during Alabama divorce proceedings to determine things like child custody and support, temporary alimony during the divorce(so that your spouse just can't cut you off and stop paying the bills) and often determines who gets to stay in the marital home.  This alimony, child custody, and child support, is only a temporary order until the divorce is final and the court has made a final determination on things like alimony, child support, child custody, etc. 

Well, I was able to secure my client temporary custody of her son, have her husband ordered out of the home, and I was able to obtain temporary alimony and temporary child support for my client during the Pendente Lite Relief hearing.  Of course, the husband received standard every other weekend visitation.  This past weekend he did not want to return the child to his mother per the court order.  In fact, he told her, "the boy is coming to live with me, and there is nothing you can do about it."  So I filed an emergency Petition for Rule Nisi, which is a contempt of court proceeding against the husband for his rash behavior.  The judge will hopefully rule on the motion ASAP.  I asked the court to put the offending husband in jail for five days(each violation of contempt is punishable by five days in jail), asked the court to make him pay my attorney's fees(which are often granted in contempt proceedings), and asked the court to end all unsupervised visitation and for the husband to return the child immediately.  I believe the court will rule in our favor soon.

When you need an Alabama divorce lawyer or attorney, do not settle for someone who does not focus his practice on Alabama family law and divorce.  I have filed six divorce complaints and answers this week alone.  I handle Alabama divorce and family law cases throughout the state of Alabama from a centrally located Birmingham locality.  And I publish this Alabama divorce and family law weblog, which requires extensive knowledge of Alabama divorce law to maintain.  I therefore, must keep myself informed of all relevant Alabama divorce and family law case law.  Do not settle for less. 

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Computers, e-mails, blackberries, GPS navigation systems, and web site records have made their way into divorce court with a vengeance.  Astute divorce and family law lawyers must be aware of new technology and how it can win or lose a divorce battle.  It is fair to say that electronic evidence has changed the face of how divorce law is practiced.  An Alabama divorce lawyer or attorney must not only know Alabama divorce law, procedure and be an aggressive litigator; but he must also understand and know the rules of electronic evidence and be familiar with the methods and means to obtain such evidence.  Because of the new technology many Alabama divorce lawyers are at a distinctive disadvantage.  Believe it or not, I know divorce attorneys who don't use e-mail.  How can these lawyers know how to obtain or even seek out this new kind of evidence found in meta-data?  Because of the huge role computers and cell phones play in our everyday lives, it is essential that your divorce lawyer has a thorough understanding of electronic evidence in today's divorce proceedings. 

I happened to have studied on under one of the world's foremost scholars on electronic evidence, Judge John Carroll, the Dean of Samford University's Cumberland School of Law in Birmingham, Alabama.  Judge Carroll was extolling the virtues of electronic evidence in the early days and sits on the national committee that has been tagged with solidifying electronic evidence laws in this country. 

I am also one of the first  attorneys to publish a divorce or family law blog in the state of Alabama and I am intimately familiar with all things in the computer world.  I try very hard to stay abreast of the latest technologies and their potential uses in divorce court.  If your significant other has a E-Harmony profile, visits Internet porn sites, or sends incriminating e-mails, I will find out and use it against them in an Alabama divorce court. 

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An recently published author argues that divorce can be liberating to some children.  Max Sindell, author of The Bright Side: Surviving Your Parent's Divorce believes that divorce can be a good thing for children.  In fact, as a child of divorce himself, he says, "it was one of the best things that ever happened to me."  Max's book spawned a website: Survivingyourparentsdivorce.com.  Max's parents divorce when he was six years old and his book offers some insights into a child's vision of divorce.  His book opens with a Divorced Kid's Bill of Rights:

• The Right to Be Safe and Feel Safe
• The Right to Awareness
• The Right to Counseling
• The Right to be Heard
• The Right to be Your Own Person
• The Right to be Neutral
• The Right to Private Communication

I applaud Max for trying to help children facing a tough time in their lives.  Even if true, and a child does benefit in some circumstances from their parents divorce, it is a fact that children will face some difficult times during their parents divorce.  Max's attempts to alleviate some apprehension in children is admirable.  He also does an excellent job of getting parents to see the divorce through their children's eyes.

As my readers know, I would never counsel someone to stay together for their kids.  It only ends up making everyone unhappy.  However, divorce can be handled in ways to minimize its effects on children, but this is only possible if both parents truly desire to do so. 

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The rules regarding divorce or custody proceedings involving military personnel are different than those affecting civilians.  The Soldiers' and Sailors' Civil Relief Act is just one way that military personnel can benefit from these different rules.  The most important aspect of the Act is the availability to stay any civil proceeding, whether it be child custody or visitation, divorce, or child support proceeding confronting the service member or their dependents. 

The Act, signed into law on Dec. 19, 2003 by President Bush expanded service member's protections and rights to include not only temporary suspension of judicial proceedings but also temporary suspension of administrative proceedings and transactions as well.  The Act provides these protections to members on active duty in all branches of the armed services as well as members of the National Guard called to active duty for over 30 days. 

If a service member receives a default divorce judgment for example, the court shall reopen the Judgment to allow the service member to defend if: 1. the military member was affected due to military service in asserting his defense and 2. the application to reopen is filed within 90 days after the end of military service. 

**The military have special rights and obligations pertaining to divorce and family law matters.  I strongly advise all military personnel to speak with an experienced attorney or lawyer who understands the substantial differences in military divorce and family law. 

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The Alabama divorce and family law attorneys and lawyers of Eversole Law offer legal services in Alabama divorce, alimony, child custody, child visitation, prenuptial and post-nuptial agreements, grandparents rights, adoption, and other Alabama family law matters. I founded my Alabama divorce and family law practice to ensure every Alabama family has access to affordable and qualified Alabama divorce and family lawyers and attorneys.  I will personally walk your family through the difficult process of an Alabama divorce proceeding and make sure your interests are protected in child custody, alimony or visitation proceedings and orders.  As an Alabama divorce lawyer I represent clients in Birmingham and throughout the state of Alabama, and I guarantee top notch service and quality legal professionalism.  When you chose an Alabama divorce lawyer or attorney from Eversole Law you are choosing personalized 24/7 service in a family like environment.  We take care of our clients in every way. 

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My Alabama divorce and family law office is centrally located in Birmingham, Alabama so that we can offer our Alabama divorce, child custody and visitation, alimony, child support, adoption, prenuptial agreements, and other family law matters practice throughout the entire state of Alabama.  I represent clients in every court in Alabama including, but not limited to the following courts and jurisdictions:

In the Birmingham, Alabama Metro area I routinely try divorce and family law cases in the following cities and counties:

Jefferson County, Adamsville, Argo, Birmingham, Bessemer, Branchville, Fairfield, Fultondale, Gardendale, Homewood, Hoover, Hueytown, Irondale, Kimberly, Leeds, Morris, Mountain Brook, Odenville, Springville, Trussville, Vestavia, Warrior 

In the Shelby County, Alabama the lawyers and attorneys of Eversole law work in the following cities and courts:

Shelby County , Alabaster,  Columbiana, Harpersville, Hoover, Vincent, Pelham, Calera

Other areas of Alabama the lawyers of Eversole Law represent clients include:

Tuscaloosa, Northport, Chilton County, Jemison, Thorsby, Altoona, Talladega County, Jefferson County, Walker County, Madison County, Cullman, Hunstville, Decatur, Florence, Guntersville, Scottsboro, Montgomery, Pelham, Gadsden, Anniston, and all other counties and municipalities in Alabama.   

***This list is not exhaustive, my office will represent divorce and family law clients across the entire state of Alabama. 

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As an Alabama divorce and family law attorney and lawyer I help people every day with serious Alabama family law and divorce issues.  Stationed centrally in Birmingham, Alabama my office routinely represents clients throughout the great state of Alabama.  We help clients through divorce,  with child custody and visitation rights, alimony, grandparents rights, child support modifications, adoptions, post divorce proceedings, contempt of court hearings, and with all things Alabama family law and divorce related.  Seldom do things turn out as perfectly for a client as they turned out today.  After getting Client X everything, and I mean, everything she asked for in her post divorce child custody and support proceedings, she had this to say about my services:

"You are great, I am so relieved and excited.  You were well worth every penny and then some.  I can't wait to tell my friends about you.  You truly cared about me and my family.  I cannot thank you enough.  Your service, price and expertise were outstanding!  I still cannot believe you were able to secure everything I asked for in the proceedings.   You are a godsend.  Thank you, thank you,  thank you." 

I am an Alabama divorce lawyer and attorney because of people like this wonderful lady.  She did nothing wrong and her husband was trying to forcibly obtain custody of her teenage daughter.  It was an underhanded move and he got what he deserved, nothing.....except some large legal fees. Ha!  This case, and these results, seeing how happy Client X was after hearing the good news, is why I became an Alabama divorce and family law lawyer and attorney.  I cannot think of another job that would allow me to have such a huge impact on the lives of people and their families.  I only hope I can continue to provide such excellent service. 

 

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Under Alabama divorce law it is possible to obtain temporary alimony from your spouse while the divorce is proceeding.  An Alabama divorce lawyer will file a motion for Pendente Lite with the court in order to obtain this temporary support.  Pendente lite is Latin for "while the action is pending."  Temporary alimony or support in Alabama is often required when a spouse cannot sustain the same standard of living during the divorce she/he would have maintained prior to the divorce proceedings.  Often, temporary support is given to spouses going through an Alabama divorce proceeding when the spouse has no other assets, i.e. a stay at home mom and wife without any other income.  However, even with additional income, if you are unable to maintain the same standard of living to which you are accustomed, you may be eligible for temporary alimony during the Alabama divorce. 

Temporary alimony is just that, temporary.  It will end when the divorce ends and will be replaced by a final spousal support award.  If you are experiencing difficulties in maintaining your standard of living during a divorce, you owe it to yourself to contact an experienced Alabama Divorce lawyer and attorney as soon as possible.  The Alabama divorce and family law attorneys and lawyers of Eversole Law will make sure you get the Alabama temporary support and alimony you deserve. 

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New research shows divorce rates skyrocketing amongst military personnel.  While the divorce rates seem to be falling across the country, the rate is up to one and five in the military.  Army research details a staggering statistic:  divorce rates in the military is up 44% from 2001 to 2007.  According to the Army, women are more likely to file for divorce than men, and enlisted personnel are more likely to file for divorce than officers.  Clearly, long deployments and combat situations have impacted military divorce rates.  It is apparent that much more should be done to help our military families with the stress of military life.  This makes me wonder if divorce among Alabama military personnel is on the rise as well?  I have no stats. on Alabama military divorce rates, but I bet the military divorce rate in Alabama is at least the national average and maybe even higher. 

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A new study suggests that divorce negatively impacts the environment.  Apparently, water and electricity use increases when couples split up and house fewer people.  This makes complete sense and most people would not have needed a study to prove such a hypothesis.  Economics, anthropology and plain common sense explain that marriage was created as a means to better allocate resources and aid procreation.  It should come as no surprise when divorce is linked to inefficient resource use.   

I will surmise, while playing amateur sociologist, that in a modern society marriage is not as important a means to such success.  Thus, we seem to have higher divorce rates today because it is not as necessary for survival.  But that's just an Alabama divorce lawyer's two cents on the matter. 

 

 

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Please check out my firm's website.  My Alabama Divorce Law firm focuses our practice on divorce, child custody, child visitation, alimony and support, property division, asset protection, family law and more.  We cross the state of Alabama and regularly handle divorce and family law cases in Birmingham, Mountain Brook, Vestavia Hills, Hoover, Pelham, Leeds, Moody, Pell City, Trussville, Huntsville, Montgomery, Mobile, Tuscaloosa, Fultondale, Irondale, Homewood; and in counties like Jefferson County, St. Clair County, Madison County, Tuscaloosa County, Shelby County, Mobile County, Walker County, Jackson County, Marshall County, Limestone County, Chilton County, Bibb County, Talladega County, Montgomery County, Etowah County, Mobile County, Cullman County, Baldwin County, Winston County, Dekalb County and Cherokee County, etc. 

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The Baldwin County, Alabama pastor whose wife disappeared at a religious conference in Louisiana received full and sole custody of his two children.  The Rev. Jason Lee's wife made news in March after walking out of a Christian Women's conference.  Her disappearance caused understandable concern and lead to widespread police searches.  She was later found to pawned her wedding ring and fled to New York.  The Alabama divorce settlement gives Rev. Lee full and sole legal custody of his two children.  The Pastor's wife will also have to pay $200 a month in child support.  The wife will get child visitation rights every other weekend and the parents will split physical custody on the holidays. 

I for one think this lady got off easy.  She abandoned her kids and fled to New York.  If not for the intense media coverage she may have never returned.  She obviously has significant mental issues and her ability to care for her children even during limited visitation periods should have been called into question.  Of course, it is always a possibility that she has a really good Alabama divorce, family law and child custody attorney and lawyer, while the Pastor does not.   

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I am happy to be posting again after a short hiatus.  A major Alabama divorce and child custody trial has kept me more than busy for the past week.  I would like to announce I have been selected as a LawInfo rated lead counsel in Alabama.  LawInfo.com rates the top Divorce and Family Law attorneys across the country and I have been selected as its Alabama representative.  Please check out LawInfo.com for more information pertaining to Alabama Divorce and Family law attorneys and lawyers. 

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Just settled a Birmingham, Alabama divorce case today.  I represented the husband in this case and answered my client's Alabama divorce complaint, filed a divorce answer and counterclaim, my own motion for pendente lite(temporary support), child custody, alimony, etc. etc.  Shortly after the first court ordered mediation we agreed to a settlement.  My client received major concessions from the other side.  I was able to give my client everything he asked for.  I secured him a favorable resolution on every single issue he contested in the divorce, kept the cost down, and did so in a timely fashion.   I am going to ask him to post a client testimonial soon.  I think he is very happy! :)

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Alabama Appeals Court annuls couples marriage on failure to consummate grounds.  The Alabama Appeals Court has basically ruled that to be legally married in Alabama, you must consummate that relationship, or your marriage is subject to annulment.  An annulment is declaring your marriage to be null and void, as if you were never married.  The court reasoned that an unstated intent to never consummate your marriage relationship is a fraud rendering that marriage invalid.

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A young female client from Birmingham, Alabama called a few weeks back in desperate need of help from an Alabama divorce lawyer.  She was crying and telling me how her husband was no good, frequently beat on her, threw her out of the house and tried to steal her baby.  She had no money, very little means to obtain any money, and in need of some sympathy and compassion.  I told her that we could file for divorce tomorrow, have a motion for temporary support requiring her husband to maintain her previous living condition and provide for her baby by the weekend, get her back in her house temporarily, file a temporary restraining order against the abusive husband in the short run, make him pay alimony, child support, attorney's fees, and get her back into the house permanently in the long run.  I have made it my mission in life to see this guy get what he deserves. 

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Divorce can have significant consequences on your credit report.  Those seeking an Alabama divorce should be aware, or should be made aware by their Alabama divorce lawyer and attorney, of the sometimes significant havoc divorce can play on your credit report.  If your ex-spouse or soon to be ex-spouse has opened up any credit accounts using your name without your knowledge or consent, that is identity theft.  Identity theft is a serious criminal act, and your chances of "winning" a nice divorce settlement just shot through the roof.  If you are both listed on a card that either spouse continues to use, you will likely still be liable for charges.  Post divorce credit problems can usually be avoided by closing the joint accounts.  However, your credit can be interwoven with your ex-spouse for a long time.  Check out this excerpt from a U.S. News and World Report Article below:

"The Federal Trade Commission warns divorcing couples that the divorce decrees they negotiate, such as a commitment that one ex-spouse will pay off credit card debt, does not absolve the other ex-spouse from responsibility from the perspective of the credit reporting agencies. Creditors can still demand payment from the other spouse, which can negatively affect credit scores if it goes unpaid."

Thanks to the Moschetti law firm's family law blog for the tip. 

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There are times when clients ask me if I can stop their divorce from happening.  The short answer to this question is simple, no you cannot stop a divorce.  When one party is determined to get divorced, the other party can do several things, but they cannot stop the divorce from occurring.  You can slow down a divorce significantly, you can make the divorce hurt more and you can make it cost more, but you cannot stop an Alabama divorce.  The nature of modern divorce law is that anyone who wants a divorce can get one.  There has been steady criticism of this practice, many people correlating the no fault divorce laws with the rise in divorce rates.  However, in Alabama, and indeed, throughout most of the country, you cannot stop a divorce from happening when the other side is determined to divorce.

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Grandparents have the right to visit their grandchildren in Alabama.  Any grandparent may file an action to enforce their grandparents visitation rights if the grandparents visitation is in the best interest of the child and one of the following conditions are met:

• One or both parents of the grandchild have died
• The parents of the grandchild have divorced
• A parent of the grandchild has abandoned the child
• The grandchild was born outside a marriage
• If the parents of the grandchild are still married and living together but one or both of the parents are using their authority to prevent a grandparents relationship with their grandchild.

The courts will look to see if a grandparents visitation is in best interest of the child.  When determining if a grandparents visitation rights are within the best interest of a child, the courts will look to the following factors for guidance:

• The grandparents willingness to cultivate a relationship with the child and his parents
• The grandchild's preference
• The health of the grandchild
• The mental and physical health of the grandparents
• Any evidence of domestic violence between one parent and another parent, parent and child, or between parent and grandparent
• Any other relevant factors, including the preferences of any living parent

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My office tries to offer a different kind of Alabama divorce and family law legal service than most law firms.  We are available 24/7 to our divorce and family law clients.  We take the extra time to explain your rights and obligations, answer any questions you may have, protect your interests, and if necessary, prepare your case for aggressive divorce and family law litigation.  At the same time, we emphasize protecting your family from the stress and anxiety of divorce and family law matters. My office employs a staff school psychologist to help your child deal with the emotional upheaval that often occurs during a divorce.  We also promote mediation or other collaborative processes in order to limit the turmoil in your life as well. 

We are also different in the way our Alabama divorce and family law practice charges for our services.  We offer flat fees in many cases.  This is very unusual in most Alabama divorce and family law practices.  However, some times a flat fee is not practical.  Its like taking a car to a mechanic.  Your mechanic may be able to give you a rough estimate of the cost to fix your car, but until he gets under the hood and starts tinkering around, he often will not be able to give you an exact price.  We do try to fix fees for our clients so they will not get stuck with huge attorney's fees they were not expecting.  We find many of our clients really prefer the flat fee alternative.  We also accept major credit cards and offer flexible payment plans. 

Our Alabama divorce and family law practice is different.  We care about our clients and it shows in the way we emphasize the health of your family during divorce and child custody proceedings, our fee arrangements, and in our 24/7 service.  I challenge anyone to call my office and another law firm.  I bet you can reach me in the first call.  If you can't, leave a message at my office and the other firm's office.  See who calls you back first. 

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An uncontested divorce occurs when both parties have worked out the all the issues involved, i.e. property division, child custody, etc., and there is no need to go to court.  Uncontested divorces are a great way to keep divorce expenses at a minimum.  I know divorce attorneys who charge anywhere from $100 to $1200 for an uncontested divorce, plus filing fees.  I charge a flat $450 fee for an uncontested divorce, $500 if children are involved, plus filing fees.  It is possible to find divorce attorney's who charge cheaper rates for an uncontested divorce.  However, the time they put into your case will suffer dramatically.  My office will spend as much time as needed to get your Alabama uncontested divorce right and to make sure you are satisfied with the process.   I am available 24/7 to my clients, and I always return your calls within a couple hours.  I do not charge for phone calls and I do not charge excess fees for any extra time your case may take.  Pay close attention to these attorneys who advertise $200 dollar uncontested divorce fees, their practice may not focus on Alabama divorce and family law, they will almost assuredly take less time to make you comfortable with the process and answer all your questions, and you could end up paying more in the long run.  Almost without fail, these $200 dollar uncontested divorce lawyers are only charging you for one hour of work.  That means, if your case cannot be handled within a one hour office visit, you get charged more.  My office does not work this way.  When we say $450 for an uncontested divorce, we mean just that, no matter the extra time we take to answer your questions and fully explain the process. 

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The Huntsville Times lists several Divorce and Family Law related support groups that meet in Huntsville, Alabama.  Sometimes we all need a little help.  Part of being a Christian is willing to help your neighbor in need.  If anyone needs help finding divorce or family law related support groups throughout Alabama please call my office, and I will do everything I can to help you and your family find the support you need.  Divorce and family law issues can be really difficult to deal with emotionally.  My Alabama Divorce and Family Law office is here to help you in your time of need.  I will do anything I can to make your life just a little better.  You are not alone. 

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Is it is good idea for financial institutions to offer loans to cover Alabama divorce costs?  Financial companies in Japan are offering loans to cover the cost of a divorce.  The loans are an attempt to help individuals restart their life after a divorce and enable everyone to afford the often high costs of divorce, and child custody litigation.  In my opinion this is a very good idea.  It seems I am contacted almost daily by someone in desperate need of quality divorce representation that cannot afford my services.  I try very hard to take pro bono cases as much as possible, I have reduced my fees in certain situations, I offer payments plans, fixed fees, and I take credit cards in order to give people access to quality Alabama Divorce and Family Law representation.  However, despite my efforts to make these services affordable, I am forced to turn away many who cannot afford my Alabama divorce and family law services on a regular basis.  I think American financial institutions should offer legal fee loans on other kinds of cases as well, not just for divorce and family law.  In my humble opinion, everyone, even those without substantial monetary means, should have the same access to quality Alabama divorce and family law legal services. 

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A client called my office today seeking advice regarding a default judgment he received in Montgomery, Alabama divorce proceedings.  My client(Mr. X), received a default divorce judgment in Montgomery County after failing to respond to a divorce complaint within the required 30 day time period.  When you receive an Alabama divorce complaint, you only have thirty days to respond.  If you do not respond, a default judgment will be rendered against you.  This basically means that the pleadings in the divorce complaint are taken as true, and most times, the petitioner will get everything they seek in the divorce.  Thus, it is very important, if you wish contest any portion of the divorce complaint, that you respond within the time period allotted.

Fortunately, Mr X has recourse.  An intelligent Alabama Divorce Lawyer looks for any way he might be able to challenge the default judgment.  In this case, Mr. X did not receive notice of the divorce proceedings, and he has jurisdictional challenges as well.  Mr. X and his soon to be ex-wife, are military personnel and move around a lot.  Mr. X's ex, moved to Montgomery, Alabama from Indiana just two months after Mr. X filed for a divorce in Indiana.  Sneaky Mrs. X then filed for an Alabama divorce in Montgomery County after coming to Alabama and while the Indiana proceedings were underway.  Thus, an Alabama divorce court does not have jurisdiction over the divorce, and Mr. X can have the default judgment set aside on jurisdictional grounds.  Basically, the Alabama domestic relations or family law court, did not have the power to enter a judgment in this case.

Mr. X can also challenge the Alabama divorce judgment on grounds he did not receive notice of the divorce.  Every Alabama divorce petitioner must give notice of the divorce proceedings to the party they are trying to divorce.  If the divorce petitioner(the one who files the Alabama divorce complaint) does not give notice of the proceedings to the one they are trying to divorce, any divorce proceeding is invalid, and can be set aside. 

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Here at the Birmingham, Alabama Divorce and Family Law blog we have been following the trials and tribulations of Britney Spears as she engaged in a vicious custody battle with her ex-husband K-Fed.  Today, Britney lost her battle and lost custody of her children.  I pontificated in an earlier post that Britney would lose her kids if she continued to abuse alcohol and drugs, and she did.  This should be a warning to everyone going through an Alabama child custody dispute.  Do not give your ex-spouse ammunition in a child custody proceeding by taking alcohol or drugs. 

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In Alabama, when a divorce has been granted in favor of one party based upon the misconduct of the other party, the judge may grant awards from the estate of the spouse committing the misconduct to the other spouse.  The misconduct itself may also be used by the judge in determining the amount of the award.  However, this provision is subject to the marital property rule and/or the inheritance rule.  In general, property held by a party prior to the marriage, or property received by inheritance or gift,  is not marital property and cannot be distributed to the other party during a divorce.  Alabama Code Section 30-2-52 defines how a judge may award property after granting a divorce based upon misconduct.   

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My Alabama divorce law practice is focused upon making Alabama divorce as simple, and as affordable as possible.  Too many Alabama divorce lawyers seem to think that charging high fees makes them important.  My firm is different.  No matter where you are located, whether you live in Birmingham, Huntsville, Montgomery, Mobile, Tuscaloosa, Cullman, Fultondale, Hueytown, Gardendale, Bessemer, Decatur, Guntersville, Scottsboro, Hoover, Pelham, Trussville, Moody, Leeds, Pell City, Homewood, Vestavia Hills, Mountain Brook,  or whether you live in Jefferson County, Madison County, Montgomery County, Walker County, or Mobile County; my firm believes in providing the very best divorce and family law service at reasonable and affordable prices.  We offer several means of payment to make it easier to obtain high quality divorce and family law legal representation.  On top of our already competitive pricing, we accept major credit cards and will even work out payment plans.  Our goal is to be the best and most affordable divorce and family law lawyers and attorneys in Alabama.  If  you can find higher quality Alabama divorce or family law legal representation, at more affordable prices, you should hire them. 

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I am a Birmingham, Alabama divorce and family law attorney who represents clients in Jefferson County, Shelby County, Madison County, and throughout the state of Alabama in places like Vestavia Hills, Trussville, Mountain Brook, Hoover, Irondale, Homewood, Gardendale, Fultondale, Hueytown, Moody, Leeds, Pelham, Tuscaloosa, Huntsville, Montgomery, and Mobile.  My practice focuses on helping families with divorce and family law, child custody, visitation, adoption, alimony, child support, prenuptial agreements, divorce child psychology, divorce mediation and collaborative law. 

We work tirelessly to help your family make it through difficult times, and we are here 24/7 for our clients.  Just today, a client seeking a divorce from Birmingham, Alabama called me at 11:30 p.m. to mostly weep and vent about her husband's divorce tactics.  I listened patiently and tried my best to be more than her lawyer.  I want my firm to be a comfort during your most troubling times.  I believe that to be a good lawyer you have to be a good listener.  Sometimes that means taking the extra time with each client.  It can also mean not taking as many clients as you might otherwise.  I limit the number of cases I take at any one time in order to devote more of my time to you personally.  It may not be the best business strategy, but it is how I would want to be treated in similar circumstances, and I believe that giving a little more of yourself will not only help my clients, but in the long run, it will make me a better person, and make people speak well of me at my funeral.  I also try very hard to make quality divorce and family law representation affordable. 

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A Jefferson County, Birmingham, Alabama client asked an interesting question today.  How is child support calculated when your ex-spouse doesn't work, or has a sporadic work history?  Primarily, when calculating child support the court looks to the well being of the child.  And when awarding child support in this situation ,an Alabama court will impute an income to your ex-spouse, if the court finds he/she is voluntarily unemployed or underemployed.  The court will estimate the unemployed or underemployed parents income, and impute that income to the spouse owing child support.  The court looks to past employment, employment potential, probable earning levels, education and job qualifications, as well as job opportunities and earning levels in the community.  The Alabama rules regarding child support can be found in the Child Support Guidelines Rule 32.

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I received a call from a client today in Birmingham, Alabama.  I realized people contemplating divorce across Jefferson County, including Vestavia, Mountain Brook, Homewood, Leeds, Bessemer, Hoover, Pelham, Trussville, Gardendale, Fultondale, Fairfield, Moody, Pleasant Grove, Adamsville and Hueytown, as well as all across Alabama in places like Huntsville, Montgomery, Tuscaloosa and Mobile, are all concerned about Alabama divorce laws. 

One of the most frequent questions I encounter about Alabama divorce laws, in Birmingham and all across the State of Alabama, and especially from women,  is "How do I support myself during the divorce?"  The answer is simple.  I will file a motion for Pendente Lite.  That motion will provide temporary support from your husband while you are going through a divorce.  This kind of support is very similar to alimony.  It allows you to continue living as you currently are while the Alabama divorce proceedings are under way.  Once the divorce is finalized you will then be eligible for alimony.  Alimony is intended to keep you relatively in the same economic position you are in during the marriage.  In that way, alimony and temporary support are very similar.  Both provide you with a means to continue your way of life for a period of time.  Motions for Pendente Lite only covers support during the divorce proceedings itself.  So, your husband or wife can't just kick you out of the house, cut off your credit cards, take the car, etc.

The Alabama Code Section 30-2-50 allows for this kind of temporary support pending the divorce action.  It provides for the allowance for support during the pendency of action.

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During a divorce, parents often feel they are victimizing their children by going separate ways.  Remember that you chose to get a divorce because you believe it is the best move to preserve your emotional welfare, as well as that of your kids.  You have weighed the pros and cons of your decision and you should make sure the goal of providing the very best environment for your kids remains your focus.  You are dealing with uncomfortable emotions right now, but don't lose faith in your ability to be the best parent a child can have. You have decided to be strong for them, so don't drop the ball on a few critical components of healthy living.  You can do this! 

At a time when your self confidence may be taking a major hit, invest yourself in maintaining the structure your kids currently have at home.  Kids tend to be unnerved by dramatic changes in their daily schedules.  Though you will be dealing with custody issues, and your children will be acclimating to the concept of having two homes, maintaining stability in your child's life is still possible.  Stability for your children begins with their schedule and their environment.  Children need to be able to predict when, and where they will be going, and what they will be doing. Don't abandon bed time routines, sit down dinners, after school activities, homework rules, etc.  These routines provide consistency for children, which is comforting.

Consider posting your child's schedule on the refrigerator so that he/she can take ownership of daily activities.  For young children, it may help to take photos of the various environments and people they will be visiting during the day so it is easily understood.  This can be a project you do together, and it's fun!!  Don't necessarily become obsessed with sticking to a regimen, just understand the value of consistency and stability.

Even if you have a shared custody situation, you are essentially a single parent during the times your kids are with you.  It's not uncommon to find it rather difficult to keep the house orderly, backpacks organized, etc.  Remember that you are not Superman, and you shouldn't feel poorly about yourself for having difficulty with some of these issues.  Consider hiring someone to clean your house or cut your grass.  It will probably be the best money you spend on yourself each month, and will probably significantly reduce your stress.  Purchase some baskets and bins to sort toys, clothes, and other items.  Your children will take pride in helping you, and will be excited about their newly navigable rooms.  And finally, remember that with change, comes new opportunities.  Keep your chin up and stand behind your own decisions.  Your strength will wear off on your children. 

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Not surprisingly, a divorce has significant consequences for children.  This site is devoted to helping parents deal with the ramifications of divorce.  It is not an option to, "stay together for the kids."  This kind of thinking only ends up hurting your children in the long run.  But we can do everything in our power to lessen the traumatic impact a divorce has on our kids.  Although many children go through their parents divorce with relatively few negative or permanent side effects, a divorce can be devastating for some children.  The changes in living arrangements, less time with one parent, etc, can be a harsh experience for some.  Based upon my experience, the best thing a parent can do to limit the negative impact a divorce has on their children is to act civilly towards your ex.  Some good rules of thumb are as follows:

• Do not argue in front of your kids in person or on the phone
• Actively pursue an amicable relationship with your ex
• Try not to bad mouth your ex in front of the kids
• Find support for you and your children
• Try to maintain your child's regular routine

 

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 Big divorce news in Atlanta.  Evangelist Juanita Bynum has had enough.  She filed papers seeking a divorce from her husband, Bishop Thomas W. Weeks III this past Monday, September 10, 2007.  According to the Atlanta Journal Constitution, divorce papers accuse the Bishop of "beating, stomping and choking" his wife.  It is sad commentary on our times, that a supposed man of God, is being accused of domestic violence.  True or not, this kind of press is bad for the truly religious. If true, it is just another example of a con artist taking money in the guise of religion.  No true man of God(or any real-man for that matter) would ever put a hand to his wife.  That being said, it is not uncommon in divorce or child custody cases for one party, normally the wife, to accuse their spouse of some kind of domestic violence.  Accusing your spouse of domestic or child abuse can be an unscrupulous means to gain the advantage during divorce or custody proceedings. 

 

 

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A great resource for parents going through a divorce, Breakthrough Parenting offers some interesting insights into better parenting.  They offer help for divorcing parents and offer classes in becoming a certified parenting coach.  In today's world, we cannot do everything alone.  This website gives parents some much needed advice. Dealing with your children who often do not understand the situation is very hard.  While we cannot eliminate these kind of stresses, my firm tries to limit them.  We are here to help you through this very difficult time.  I want my office to be more than just a law firm.  When you retain my firm we are here through thick and thin, to the very end, and we are on call 24/7.

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DivorceSupport.com is a fantastic resource for people facing divorce.  The website has excellent Alabama divorce specific information.  They have articles on Alabama divorce, child support and child custody, residency requirements, grandparents rights and military divorce laws.  When you are going through a divorce you need as much information and support available.  My firm tries to provide you with the resources to make this process as simple as possible .  We also strive to give you all the information you need during these troubling times.  Knowing how the divorce or child custody process works will give you a certain amount of comfort.  I encourage my clients to learn as much as they can about their divorce and related issues.  The Internet is an amazing resource and should be used accordingly.

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The differences between mediation and collaborative law can be relatively minor.  Both mediation and collaborative law are alternative dispute resolution techniques that resolve a divorce without involving a court. Here is a link from divorcenet.com detailing the differences, advantages and disadvantages to both.  There is also some good information to aid in determining whether or not you would be a good candidate for the collaborative process.

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Collaborative law is a relatively new phenomenon in legal circles.  My firm believes that collaborative law is a very viable and healthy means to effectuate a divorce.  In fact, we stress collaborative processes and other alternative dispute resolution methods in order to keep your divorce costs low.  It is also a means to protect your family against the trauma often associated with contested and messy divorces.  We tailor your legal needs to the situation.  If you are a good candidate for mediation or collaborative law, we will pursue that option. If you are in need of aggressive litigation, we also provide those services.  However, I am here to help you.  And steering you towards a divorce that only fattens my pocket is not in your best interest, and is often not in your families long term interest either.  Resistance to the collaborative process seems to be primarily from old attorneys, who are holding on tightly to the past, and want to continue milking their clients for every dollar. 

Here is a nice article on the collaborative process. You will also find a basic introduction to the collaborative process reprinted from here:

What is Collaborative law?

When they separate or divorce, couples must find a way to resolve their differences on all relevant issues. Collaborative practice is designed to minimize conflict while working toward that resolution. Parties to divorce, their attorneys and any other professional involved, agree to make a good faith attempt to reach a mutually acceptable settlement without going to court. Working together, they strive to dissolve the marriage in a way that addresses everyone’s legal, financial, and emotional needs.

At the beginning of the process husband, wife, and both attorneys sign a Participation Agreement. The agreement requires both parties to:

1. exchange complete financial information so that each spouse can make well-informed decisions
2. maintain absolute confidentiality during the process, so that each spouse can feel free to express his or her needs and concerns,
3. reach written agreement on all issues and concerns outside of contested court proceedings
4. authorize the attorneys to use the written agreement to obtain a final court decree.

The parties may also agree to involve other professionals to assist in the process. These professionals are also bound by the terms of the Collaborative Agreement.

Is Collaborative Law right for you?

Collaborative law empowers spouses to dissolve their marriage with dignity.

Consider Collaborative law if you and your spouse:

• believe it is important to protect your children from the harm litigation can inflict
• place a high value on personal responsibility in resolving conflict
• are able to focus on a positive solution for the entire family
• want to preserve a respectful working relationship during and after the process is over
• see the need to disclose full and accurate information about financial issues

How it works

First, both spouses meet with their respective Collaborative attorneys to discuss individual needs and concerns. Then, the couple and their attorneys meet in four-way sessions to reach a settlement without involving the court. Every issue – including property division, parenting allocation, and support – is put “on the table” in these sessions. At times other professionals including Mental Health Professionals and Financial Experts may become part of the “team” to assist couples in reaching resolutions. Divorcing parties benefit from the skills, advice, and support of attorneys and other professionals while striving to work things out in a positive, future-focused manner.

When a settlement is reached, attorneys file the appropriate paperwork required by the court.

Key advantages

• You retain control. Though you each have a lawyer, you and your spouse take responsibility for shaping the settlement as the key members of the team.
• You gain support. You craft the settlement cooperatively with your spouse while benefiting from your attorney’s advocacy, problem-solving, and negotiating skills. You receive insight and support from other professionals who assist in identifying your interests and your children’s needs.
• You can focus on settlement. Removing the threat of “going to court” reduces anxiety and fear, thereby helping you focus on finding positive solutions.
• You lay groundwork for a better future. There is no pain-free way to end a marriage, but by reducing stress, working in a climate of cooperation, and treating each other with respect, you and your spouse are creating an environment in which you and your children can thrive.
• You get more from your resources. The collaborative process is usually less costly and time-consuming than litigation. When you reach an agreement, it can be finalized within a shorter time frame. You do not get bogged down for months while you wait for a court date.
• You negotiate a better settlement. Every family is unique and every family deserves a unique solution to the issues raised in a separation or divorce proceeding. The collaborative process produces final agreements that are frequently more detailed and complete than any order that would be issued by a judge after a contested court proceeding.

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Joint Custody is preferred and deemed to be in the best interest of the child.  Alabama Code section 30-3-150 makes it state policy to encourage joint custody whenever both parents "have shown the ability to act in the best interests of their children." The court must consider joint custody, but is free to grant custody in any form it determines is in the best interest of the child.  The court looks to several factors when deciding to award joint custody: 

• The court looks at the parents wishes regarding joint custody
• The parents willingness and ability to work together and make decision in the best interest of the child
• Ability of each parent to foster the child's love for their ex
• Potential for any kind of abuse or kidnapping
• Distance between parents and practical geographic implications of joint custody
• The court may order a form of joint custody without the consent of both parents, when it is in the best interest of the child.

****When both parents request joint custody, joint custody is presumed to be in the best alternative.  Thus, in Alabama, joint custody is required unless the court makes specific findings as to why it is not.  Check out this helpful guide listing some Alabama Divorce and Custody code sections ,as well as other valuable divorce and child custody resources. 

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In an effort to be the best darn divorce and family law attorney I can be, I spend literally 30 hours a week just reading divorce and family law literature.  Some of the best work being published today is on-line.  Blogs give attorneys creative outlets to express themselves and to educate others on their particular area of the law. 

This blog has taught me so much about family law.  I have to research everything I write on this site.  I have to research other blogs, read family law journals, texts, and treatises.  I have to stay abreast of recent family law and divorce case law, happenings and trends.  And I do all this while maintaining a thriving family law practice.  None of this would be possible of course, without the rest of the Blog world.  Attorneys like David Gabay provide a valuable service and links us to helpful tips in selecting your divorce attorney here. Thank you David, and thanks Blog world!

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Sometimes divorce is a necessary means to achieving a happier life.  While we provide services that enable you to start a new life, we also try to acclimate you and your children to these changes. My practice attempts to minimize the impact a divorce has on you, and your children. You can find valuable resources about dealing with your children at childrenanddivorce.com that may aid your child during a divorce.

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A prenuptial agreement is often used to protect an individuals assets in the event of death or divorce.  The agreement is prepared to define property rights and to also define any additional obligations that arise during the marriage relationship.  You should disclose all the assets you possess truthfully.  Prenuptial agreements are carefully scrutinized by the Court to determine if they are just and reasonable.  Hiding assets could be a means to invalidate an otherwise valid prenuptial agreement.  Here are a few tips pertaining to prenuptial agreements.

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Parents often have a difficult time dealing with the time constraints divorce places on their lives.  Juggling schedules during a marriage is hard, and when children are involved, it gets harder after divorce.  Divorce is an emotional and draining experience, especially during the holidays or during vacation time.  Here is a list prepared by divorcenet.com on ten tips to a relaxing vacation or holiday. 

I believe tip number ten from the above list is one that applies to more than just holiday and divorce scheduling, and is perhaps the best means to having a better life after divorce. Let the children love you ex-spouse, move on with your life, and try not to harbor ill feelings.  I realize that is easier said than done and that sometimes it can take years to get over the negative emotions involved with your ex.  But without fail, the ones who have moved on and no longer feel anger towards their ex-spouse are resoundingly the happiest. 

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In Alabama, a party's separate estate is not automatically included in the Marital Property of the both spouses.  Likewise, a spouse's inheritance and gifts he/she receives, even while married, remains their own property, unless you move to convert the property into marital property.  You can covert your property into marital property by several means. Here are a few common examples:

•  You could deposit your inheritance or gift into a joint checking account that both parties have access to and regularly make withdrawals.
• Or you could inherit a nice beach house from your grandfather and you regularly take the family to the beach for vacations. The house is now marital property.

The court replies upon one key determining factor when it has to decide these issues.  The question invariably becomes, has the property been used "regularly for the common benefit of the parties in a divorce."

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The purpose of Alimony in Alabama is to preserve, as much as is possible, the economic living condition of the parties as they existed during the marriage. There is a duty to maintain the status of their ex-spouse until such time as the spouse is self-supporting or maintaining a similar status to the one enjoyed before the separation.

The two most important factors to be considered in determining alimony payments are:

1. The need of the spouse receiving alimony.
2. The ability to pay by the spouse paying alimony.

However, there is a laundry list of factors that courts do take into consideration:

• Standard of living during the marriage
• Age and gender of each party
• Length of the Marriage
• Bad conduct by a party that caused the divorce(adultery)
• Health of each party
• Potential for maintaining their standard of living without spouse

Alimony can result from long and short term marriages as well.

 

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The Alabama "venue statute," sets out the proper county to file your Alabama divorce actions.  Venue is just a fancy lawyer word for the place you file divorce papers. The Code provides several methods to establish proper venue.  Proper venue can be established in one of three ways:

1. You may file your divorce papers in the county where your spouse resides.
2. In the county where you resided with your spouse at the time of separation.
3. Or, if your spouse is a non-resident, the county in which he/she resides.

When both parties are residents of Alabama, divorce complaints can be filed in either the county in which your spouse resides, or in the county where you both lived before the separation occurred. It is also possible to file in any county you want, if your spouse agrees. 

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I was researching women's divorce issues and ran across an article published by The Modern Women's Divorce Guide. They have an excellent list of what a woman should do when preparing for a divorce. Check it out here. 

 

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Common law marriage in Alabama requires a showing of the following elements:

• Capacity
• Mutual agreement to enter a permanent marriage relationship
• Some public recognition of the relationship as a marriage
• A public assumption of marital duties and cohabitation

To establish a common law marriage, there must be clear and convincing evidence that the parties lived as husband and wife.  An important issue is whether or not the parties believed, or considered themselves to be married.  Other evidence can be used to establish a common law marriage , such as whether or not the couple shared household expenses, held joint accounts at the bank, or did they file joint tax returns.

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The Alabama Rules provide the following non-inclusive list of reasons for deviating from the child support guidelines:

1. Shared physical custody or visitation rights for periods of physical custody or care of children is substantially in excess of those customarily approved.
2. Extraordinary costs of transportation for purposes of visitation borne substantially by one parent.
3. Expenses of college education incurred prior to a child reaching the age of majority.
4. Assets or, or unearned income received by or on the behalf of, a child.
5. Such other facts or circumstances that the court finds contribute to the best interest of the child for whom support is being determined. A.R.J.A., Rule 32(A)(1)(e).

The existence of any factor above does not require the court to deviate from the guidelines, but may be considered by the court in doing so.  Furthermore, the court may deviate from the guidelines even without any of the above factors as well. 

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A child has a basic right to receive support.  The parents obligation to provide such support cannot be removed except by a termination of parental rights, i.e. adoption.  The rules governing child support in Alabama can be found in the Alabama Child Support Guidelines, Alabama Rules of Judicial Administration, Rule 32.

The calculation of the support figure from the guidelines above is deemed correct unless shown otherwise.  The guidelines are not intended to be carved in stone. They are "guidelines" only. They are meant as a map to assist parties, lawyers, and judges in making more consistent awards of child support.

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Alabama Courts have wide discretion in child custody cases.  A child becomes a ward of the court in custody proceedings, and any matter affecting the child is a concern of the court. 

In Ex parte Divine , the Alabama Supreme Court enumerated twelve factors to be considered when deciding what is in the best interest of child in custody proceedings:

• Sex and age of the child
• Emotional, social, moral, material and educational needs of each child
• Home environments offered by each parent
• Parents age, character, stability, mental and physical health
• Parents capacity and interest in providing for the emotional, social, etc., needs of child
• Relationship between each child and each parent
• Relationship between children
• Effect on child of disrupting or continuing an existing custodial status
• Preference of child, if the child is of sufficient age and maturity
• Recommendations of experts
• Any available alternatives
• Any relevant matter

Past performance is often crucial in determining custody.  However, a spouse's prior performance may not be an accurate portrait of their future performance once the realities of a divorce are present.  A spouse who used to work at home taking care of the kids, may not be able to stay home full-time once the divorce is final.  Their financial situation, time constraints and other realities have changed.

Thus, a court has the ultimate power in determining how your children are raised in a custody proceeding. This is just one more reason why my firm advocates divorce mediation and collaborative legal processes whenever possible.  You should be the ones determining your child's best interest, not the courts. 

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Alabama law recognizes twelve grounds for granting a divorce.  The twelve grounds recognized by Alabama law are as follows:

• Incapacity
• Adultery
• Abandonment
• Imprisonment
• Crimes Against Nature
• Habitual Drunkenness/Drug Addiction
• Incompatibility of Temperament
• Mental Incapacity/Insanity
• Irretrievable Breakdown
• Pregnancy
• Violence/Cruelty
• Non-Support & Separation

You do not need to know that much about the grounds for divorce in Alabama.  Most divorces today are "no fault" divorces, such as incompatibility.  However, if your husband or wife has committed "adultery," or committed, heaven forbid, a "crime against nature", that fact may benefit you significantly in any divorce settlement.

All you really need to get a divorce in Alabama is 1) jurisdiction and  2) residence.  What that really means is one of you has lived in Alabama for at least six months.

 

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