Birmingham Divorce Update: Discussing Money Matters can make a Marriage More Secure

The causes for divorce are many, but one of the primary reasons couples in Alabama get divorced is due to issues surrounding money. Whether it’s poor financial planning, excessive spending by one or both spouses or simply constant disagreement over household financial priorities, money can be the bane of a marital relationship. A surprisingly large percentage of people who become legally separated, as well as those who actually go through divorce, will tell you that money was the culprit.

As a Birmingham family law and divorce attorney, I’ll add that it’s not just money, but the lack of communication about money that trips people up. A good marriage thrives on communication. Lack of communication hardly ever helps a relationship survive and often leads to divorce.

A recent New York Times article addressed this subject. There are several things to keep in mind when approaching the subject of household finances. Whether you’re living together and planning to get married, or married already, these pointers may make the difference in whether or not your future together will be relatively smooth going or rocky from the start.

Money: Topics of Conversation

  1. Explore with your partner each other’s background as it applies to financial education. Did your parents teach you about money and personal finances? And what is your “financial philosophy”?
  2. Talk about credit. Does each person know his or her credit score? Be honest about why your score may be low or how it could be improved. How can your credit scores and credit history affect your future as a married couple? Will they affect your goals?
  3. Discuss who will take the lead in handling the family finances. Who handles it now? And who will decide how much each person can spend in order to maintain a positive cash flow for the family?
  4. Talk about where you want to be financially in five years. Where do you want to be in 10 or 20 years? And what are your individual goals for retirement?

Marital Finances: For Richer, For Poorer
It’s hard to get through modern life these days without money, but when two people commit legally to each other, as with a marriage, each other’s finances become tied together, legally. A couple looking toward marriage should consider how the future combining of that pool of savings, income and finances will affect their life together. It can make for a smooth transition to a happy and growing marital relationship.

As a divorce lawyer in Alabama, I’ve seen the result of poor financial planning and bad money management and how these can negatively impact a marriage. Love may be the reason you got together, but money can be your undoing. My advice is to be open and talk about each other’s wants and needs. You may find that it’s liberating and takes the guesswork out of planning for your happy future together.

 

Money Talks to Have Before Marriage, NYTimes.com, October 23, 2009

Getting Married in Alabama? Consider a Prenuptial Agreement for Protection in Case of Divorce

These days everyone is concerned about their future. Individuals facing marriage are no different and that is why many people considering marriage look at a prenuptial agreement as a way of preserving their property in case the marriage somehow does not work out. While a “prenup” should not be looked at as foreshadowing a future breakdown (and possible divorce) in a marital relationship, it is many times a necessary “evil” in these uncertain times.

As a Birmingham divorce and family law attorney, I’ve helped many clients craft their prenuptial agreements based on their own set of personal circumstances. Whether you are a future husband or wife, a big concern for many folks is how even the suggestion of a prenup will affect their relationship heading into marriage. Frankly, if both partners are adults, it should not affect their romantic relationship one bit.

From a legal standpoint, a prenuptial agreement is simply a written document created between the bride and groom prior to the marriage ceremony and exchanging of vows. Like any agreement, the prenup addresses property settlements in the event of divorce -- this may or may not include other legal considerations, such as additional obligations that may arise during the marriage.

For couples in Alabama, the law provides for certain required procedures during the creation of the prenup. These include full financial disclosure between the two parties. An important point to make here is that the law in no uncertain terms prohibits a prenuptial agreement if either party has not truthfully represented the facts.

While prenuptial agreements became well known years ago as the wealthy person’s prerequisite to marriage, these documents have becomes more and more common among individuals of more modest means. Perhaps even more important for those who have worked so hard for just a modest nest egg or investment property, prenuptial agreements are a means of reassuring the soon-to-be spouses that each party’s assets are protected.

Not just a way of preserving one’s wealth in the event of a divorce, prenuptial agreements can also be used in the event of death or to establish other postnuptial agreements.

Another use for a prenup is when entering into a second marriage. Since an individual may have sizable assets from a previous marriage, creating a prenuptial agreement is a way of retain sole ownership of those assets so that they may be passed onto any children from the first marriage, for example.

As with any legal document -- to ensure that a prenuptial agreement is valid and to be sure that both partner’s rights are protected -- I highly recommend that each party consult with their own separate attorneys prior to entering into the prenup. It may not be the most romantic aspect of marriage, but it could make your future that much more secure.

 

Alabama Divorce and Family Law Update: More Child Custody Concerns

In Alabama, as in other parts of the country, there are certain issues that accompany divorce. As a Birmingham divorce and family law attorney, my office handles all aspects of legal separation, divorce, marital agreements and other legal matters affecting couples in Birmingham and the surrounding area. Anyone with kids who is going through or contemplating a divorce should consider the laws governing custody and visitation rights.

Custody in Alabama
The law provides for three different types of child custody: That of temporary custody, physical custody and, of course, legal custody. In Alabama, the courts typically encourage folks to share responsibility for their children by ordering joint custody whenever practical and physically possible. However, numerous factors must be considered before making this judgment.

It’s important to note that the courts in Birmingham, Montgomery and other cities and towns throughout the state are always able to deviate from the general rule as long as it is in the best interest of the child (or children).

Temporary Custody
This approach to custody, temporary, is exactly what it sounds like. Usually when a couple with children at home files for a divorce, the court will automatically enter and order for temporary child custody. This is just for the duration of the proceedings so that the children’s immediate interests are addressed, but the final custody decision always overrides this order at the conclusion of the divorce. The marital agreement should include the court’s final custody and visitation order.

Legal Custody
The final marital agreement will include a legal child custody order. Joint legal custody means that both parents make the major decisions that affect any children the couple may have. Naturally, the courts look for a cooperative attitude between the parents to ensure that the decisions will be made jointly and in the best interest of the children.

Alabama Joint Custody
An important point to make here is that the State of Alabama has a policy, which is governed by Alabama law that encourages the court to order joint custody in all custody cases, but allows the courts to deviate from that rule if it is in the best of the children.
If it deviates a court wishes to deviate from public policy, the court must state its findings in the record.

These are all practical considerations for any spouse to consider when children are involved. I always encourage people in this difficult time of their lives to consult early with a qualified divorce and family law attorney. A qualified legal expert can explain the various forms of custody, and answer any other questions you may have about divorce, custody or visitation orders.

 

Birmingham Divorce Law: Understanding Child Custody here in Alabama

One of the biggest concerns among parents going through a divorce is the law’s affect on the custody of the children. In this respect, couples without kids have less to worry about, but having a qualified family law and divorce attorney at your side is the first step toward a better outcome. Here in Birmingham, and across Alabama as well, the courts have a great deal of discretion when it comes to child custody cases.

In any custody proceeding, the child or children in question become wards of the court, and as such the court is entirely concerned with any issues affecting those children. For example, in Ex parte Divine, the Alabama Supreme Court listed a dozen factors that must be considered when deciding upon the best interests of a child during a custody proceeding. These include:

  • Sex and age(s) of the child or children
  • Emotional, social, moral, material and educational needs of each child
  • Type of home environment offered by each parent
  • Each parent’s age, character, stability, and mental and physical health
  • The individual parent’s capacity and interest in providing for the emotional, social, etc., needs of child or children
  • Relationship between each child and each parent
  • Relationship between the children themselves
  • Effect on the children that disrupting, or continuing, an existing custodial arrangement would possibly cause
  • Any preference(s) of child or children, assuming they are of sufficient age and maturity
  • Recommendations of experts
  • Any available alternatives
  • Any relevant matters

Understand that past performance is often quite crucial in the court’s determination as to custody of a child. However, a spouse's prior performance may not be an accurate portrait of their future performance once the realities of a divorce become known. For example, a spouse who used to work at home taking care of the kids may not be able to stay home full-time once the divorce is final. This happens frequently as the financial situation of one of the two parents usually changes substantially after the divorce. The same can be said for his or her time constraints and other realities, which may have changed as well.

Because of this, the court has ultimate power in determining the custody situation with each child during the proceedings. This is just one more reason why my firm advocates divorce mediation and collaborative legal processes whenever possible. Parents should be the ones determining your child's best interests, not the courts.


 

Marriage in Birmingham, Alabama: Before and After Divorce

Marriage is a sacred institution which sometimes becomes a trial for those ill-suited to the needs of another, or the sacrifices which a marital partnership requires. As a Birmingham divorce lawyer and family law attorney, I have helped many couples through their individual rough patches. Unfortunately, even the best of counseling cannot hold together a relationship that has fallen apart. That is when legal separation or actual divorce become the only alternative, sad to say.

To begin, in Alabama a valid marriage is marked by a number of conditions. Each of these, and as a group, helps to define what is or is not a legal marriage in the state of Alabama. They include the following:

  • Nobody under 14 years of age has the capacity to contract marriage
  • For all persons under the age of 18, the consent of a parent or guardian is absolutely required
  • Both parties to the marriage must be of sound mind
  • Each must be able to contract marriage, and
  • The parties cannot be related, at least within a prohibited degree as defined by the state

The Alabama Marriage Protection Act, which was made into law in 1998, specifies that marriage is an inherently unique relationship between a man and a women. A marriage contracted between individuals of the same sex is invalid in Alabama. ALA. CODE 30-1-19(b) (1975). Furthermore, the act also holds that the State of Alabama shall not recognize the marriage of parties of the same sex from other states.

Finally, a marriage cannot exist without the mutual consent of both parties. Since consent is lacking if a previous marriage existed, or when consent is procured by duress, a marriage is not valid when obtained under either circumstance. This is when my work as a divorce lawyer must inevietably come into play. Divorce legally separates and divides a family's assets, and in some cases it actually divides the family. But this is a discussion for another time.